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Article:The Fast Fifteen: Other Famous Contract Signings

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With Fernando Lamas getting a one day contract to play for the New York Yankees, and then strike out, I took a look at some other notable people signing contracts that mostly went horribly wrong. Note that this is not real, everything here is made up.

15. Sam Cassell signs one day contract with Team Xebulon of the Mars Basketball League. Cassell went 2-5 with 7 points in 14 minutes as Xebulon won 88-69.

14. John Madden gets 1 day contract to play linebacker for Packers. Sacks Brett Favre, proceeds to get yanked away as he wouldn't get up.

13. Tee Martin gets 2 day contract to man the hot dog stand.

12. Jared Lorenzen gets 30 minute contract to drive kids around in Oscar Meyer Wienermobile. Violates contract by eating it by mistake, fined $50,000.

11. Christopher Cross signs 45 minute contract with Yankees to regain fame he once had.

10. Nick Nolte in 1988 signed with the Giants for a preseason game, Nolte said "Taylor is on some strong stuff....I want some of it."

9. Bud Abbott and Lou Costello sign with St. Louis Cardinals, players boycott after trying to figure out Who's On First?

8. The entire ESPN broadcast team split into groups and signed one day contracts with either a Boston, New York, or LA team. Stephen A. Smith fails to perform task of choking Zeke, instead yells at him, Isiah almost resigns. Stuart Scott gets hit in eye with football at Jets scrimmage.

7. Tim McCarver signs 2 day contract to teach the young kids in Europe the fundamentals in baseball... do I really need to have a joke afterwards?

6. BigPPup signs 5 day contract with Wikia just so he can sack DNL.

5. John Kruk signs 1 month contract with Yankees to fulfill that "fat white guy on team" deal they have made.

4. David Beckham signs with LA Galaxy, saying "he's always wanted to be a soccer player". Beckham has scored no goals in MLS play.

3. Joe Buck signs deal with unnamed network for TV talk show.....oh wait....the rumors are actually swirling.

2. Kobe Bryant signs 1 day contract for birthday with the Eagle County Stallions of the Colorado Basketball League. Bryant booed the entire way, score 56 points in 144-101 win over Colorado State Rams.

1. Greg Oden signs 2 year deal (1 in case of injury) with Portland Trailblazers, making him, at 87, the oldest basketball player to ever play in the NBA. Oden has one more year and his health care is wonderful.

Have a great weekend everyone!

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