Doug collins
After narrowly escaping the fate of becoming a highly watchable fast break team that can't beat the Spurs by losing out on Mike D'Antoni, the Chicago Bulls have decided to rehire Dough Collins after almost twenty years. Leaving behind a prosperous career as an insightful yet yawn-inducing broadcaster on TNT, Collins steps into the fortunate position of trying to turn around a drastically underachieving team with the assistance of this year's number one draft pick. In his last season with the Bulls, he took the team to the Conference Finals... or course he had some Jordan guy's help. His first order of business will likely be slapping the cognac out of Joakim Noah's mouth.

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