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What are Some Better Things to do Than Listening about T.O.?

8
Vote

by user LastRow

In staying with the T.O. theme for the day, why not, this is all we’ve freaking heard about. Although, just the mention of suicide all the it encompasses is a real drag. I’ve decided to up lift the spirits out there…There’s no reason to thank me. The entire purpose of creating this list is to try & put the smiles back on all the sports fans faces out there, because, well, let’s face it folks, even mentioning the term “suicide”…It’s just no laughing matter!

This list while short will hopefully spread some sports cheer…And by all means, please feel free to add some more suggestions. The more suggestions, the more sports cheer that we’ll be able to spread! Now it’s time for the all important list of: “What are Some Better Things to do Than Listening about T.O.?”

Have my fingernails ripped off one at a time

Put my balls in a blender or microwave (your preference) & turn it on

Hold my hand in an open flame for 60 seconds

Have all my teeth pulled one at a time…Have the painkillers on standby!

Be stretched apart like those torture machines

Be tied down and stung by bees until death…Perhaps Terrell should try this method next?

Endure major surgery while awake, until death becomes…This method might suit him better? Talk about a job for your painkillers.

Have needles pushed slowly into my eyes….Take it like a man, no painkillers needed here!

Be completely skinned alive…Would surely make for a nice fur coat!

Have both of my achilles tendons cut…What the hell, I can’t walk anyway!

Reenact the whole blowtorch to the melon scene courtesy of Home Alone

Run a marathon barefoot

I’d rather have someone come over & do dental work from my backside up through my ass…Pain killers optional!

Tack my tongue to a countertop with a nail gun…See there’s hope for Owens yet!

Well, this is all I’ve got peeps…Now it’s your turn to make the list grow!

LastRowSports.com


Date

Wed 09/27/06, 3:35 pm EST


Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
JoebookRed-Shirting
1171 days ago
Score 1+-
listening to Drew Rosenhaus? it's close...
Permalink | Reply
UfgatorsDiv-I Stud
1171 days ago
Score 1+-
"Be completely skinned alive…Would surely make for a nice fur coat!" <--- are you a dog or something? ;p
Permalink | Reply
LastRowAll-American
1171 days ago
Score 0+-
WOOF!
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1170 days ago
Score 1+-
UMFg - who do you know that wears dog fur coats??
Permalink
EnyboDiv-I Stud
1170 days ago
Score 1+-
Mr Burns wears dog fur coats.
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1170 days ago
Score 1+-
+Thank you Norm! I knew if I read one T.O article, LastRow's would be the one.

I'd rather watch the douche bags on ESPN ask every single basketball player, baseball player, boxer, horse jockey and commentator questions about T.O. - I knew when I heard it, it was a non-event, yet they called it 'attempted suicide' ALL NIGHT long!!!

I'm actually in Philly today, and for town that "doesn't care about T.O." they sure talk about him ALL THE TIME on EVERY CHANNEL!!!

East Coast Drama - that's all there is here!

I'm going to a funeral today - as I'd MUCH rather being doing it than wacthing T.O. Non-News coverage

Tomorrow on 610WIP - T.O. forgets to put the lid down, too!

Long Live Tinker Owens!!!
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1170 days ago
Score 2+-
breakdance naked (except doused in barbeque sauce) on a cheese grater covered with fire ants, put in my contacts with molten hot nails in a pneumatic nailgun, slide down a razor blade pole into a pool of heavily salted rubbing alcohol, THEN go cross-country wake boarding on land behind a slow granny car with no wake board and the turn signal on...
Permalink
JoebookRed-Shirting
1170 days ago
Score 1+-
this is what i love about you, manny...
Permalink
Anonymous Fanatic #1
1170 days ago
Score 1+-
Have my ear cut off and my wound doused in gasoline- Resevoir Dogs But seriously, do I really care that Terrell Owens is depressed or that he might kill himself? That is his own personally bull shit, all I want to know is how fast he will tear apart that already crappy Cowbos orginization.
Permalink | Reply
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This page was last modified 18:07, 28 September 2006. Content is available under the GFDL.

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