Washington Redskins vs. Dallas Cowboys (September 17, 2006): Live Blog from a Redskins Fan and Cowboys Fan

Josh here to liveblog the Sunday night Redskins game against the Hated Dallas Cowboys. We've got a Hated Cowboys fan doing a liveblog from the star-helmet perspective. Just so everyone knows, here's the names I'm going to be using for certain people mentioned here: "Almost God" is Joe Gibbs. "Last Year's Jesus" is Santana Moss. "Moses" is Gregg Williams and "Elisha" is Al Saunders. "Tom Cruise's New Best Friend" is Dan Snyder. "The Future" is Jason Campbell, if he gets in the game. "Bitch-tits Bob" is, of course, Bill Parcells. "He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named" is Jerry Jones. And finally, "Coach Janky Spanky," "Dr. I Don't Know," "Rev. Gonna Change," "Southeast Jerome," etc. is Clinton Portis. Just to warn you, if the Skins pull off a play like the passes to Moss last year vs. the Hated Cowboys, it might get a little crazy in here. The time format, just as it was with my MNF liveblog from last week, is that the time stated is time left in the specified quarter.

Pregame

Last week I figured Pink was just doing the opener for that week. My room-mates and I discussed it and we decided "surely they're not using her evey week. Monday Night Football has Hank Williams Jr. and NBC gets Pink? This has to be a one-time thing." As it turns out, nope. Pink is evidently doing the opener every week. That's...unexpected. And heeeeeere we go!

First Quarter

The Hated Cowboys kickoff to our Beloved Redskins.

14:56 Rock Cartwright is immediately drilled on the return. I'm anxious about not having Portis in this game for the Skins.

14:49 The Skins are wearing the maroon unis. I love the maroon unis. I wish they'd wear them every game.

13:42 Three and out, three plays to Betts. Fantastic start.

13:25 T.O. throws an illegal block. If I were an NFL analyst I'd be going crazy right now about how T.O. is doing everything he can to destroy the entire universe on every single play. But I like T.O. apart from the fact he plays for the Hated Cowboys.

12:38 Nice to see both teams starting out clean, with no penalties. Wait. Strike that. Reverse it.

12:30 A long Hated Cowboys run called back for a tripping penalty. The Skins have to stop the run though, they can't let that happen all night long.

11:20 Guys, guys, guys, stop holding.

10:47 I have Julius Jones on my fantasy team, and I absolutely can't stand it. But what am I supposed to do? Nobody else is available, and nobody will trade me anything close to equal for him.

9:46 The Hated Cowboys are driving, and it's a nice drive. The Skins can't do anything to stop them, and then they tack on stupid penalties after the plays. This is not starting well for Our Beloved Redskins.

7:59 Washington holds The Hated Cowboys to a field goal. Better than a touchdown, thanks to a T.O. drop. I bet he did that on purpose because he hates Drew Bledsoe and everything Bledsoe stands for.

7:51 Nice return by Cartwright, but the Skins commit yet another penalty. It'd be nice if they could get through one drive without a dumb mistake.

7:51 In reply to BigPPup's comment about the Skins hanging with Tom Cruise, I bet even Clinton Portis thinks Cruise is batshit insane.

5:58 Thhhrrrrreeeee and out by the Skins. Afhjfbsuadwffhjjhrheru.

4:45 It's not right that The Hated Cowboys offense looks so much better than the Redskins offense right now.

3:36 I'm trying to guess when Bledsoe is going to throw the first of his traditional interceptions. I bet...late 2nd, early 3rd quarter.

3:00 I am not happy right now. The Redskins are not doing anything on defense and are committing stupid penalties all the time. Almost God has to get Moses and Elijah together and figure out what's going wrong.

2:33 Touchdown Hated Cowboys. Not cool. Not cool.

2:33 I bet the Skins are setting the Hated Cowboys up for another two-touchdowns-to-Moss run at the end of game. Gotta keep telling myself that.

2:21 Mike Sellers completes the first big Skins play of the game. Every time I hear "Mike Sellers" I think of the Pink Panther guy.

0:57 Roughing the QB on The Hated Cowboys. If you keep cheating, guys, you won't be America's Team anymore.

0:35 Hated Cowboys cheating again.

0:00 I hope Jason Campbell plays sooner rather than later.

Second Quarter

14:20 John Hall makes up for last week by actually making a field goal. 10-3 in favor of America's Former Team.

12:47 A friend of mine who's here for the party says he used to be a Hated Cowboys fan when he lived in Texas, but he stopped being a fam because his dad wouldn't let Dallas games be shown in the house because "Jerry Jones is that much of a prick." Now that's a story!

11:45 The hilarious new Toyota Tacoma commercial is a big hit here.

11:05 Speaking of commercials, the Coors Light commercials with the NFL coaches at press conferences are brilliant.

10:59 I am genuinely confused as to why the Skins offense isn't working. Al Saunders is a very good offensive coach. I don't know if it's going to take a while for the players to really understand the playbook or what, but something's not right here.

9:56 Marion Barber The Third does not get in on the first try, or hopefully the next three.

8:38 Marion Barber The Third gets in on fourth down. Man, if the Skins could have held them there.

8:25 Afbshjybrbggygygsegyrn!!!!!!!! Redskins touchdown! 100-yard return by Cartwright!

6:58 Owens just got crushed by Sean Taylor. Sean Taylor, that's Sean who.

6:08 Man, Last Year's Jesus almost broke that for a touchdown. So close.

4:06 Brunell is throwing behind the receivers, getting sacked, etc. Jason! Campbell! Clap Clap Clap! Jason! Campbell! Clap! Clap! Clap!...

3:04 Rumph doing his best Sean Taylor impression and absolutely leveling some unnamed Hated Cowboys player.

1:10 Brunell isn't doing anything but, thank goodness, neither is Bledsoe. Two mediocre quarterbacks captaining storied franchises. Folks, that is why the NFL is the biggest pro league in the United States.

0:00 End of the first half, 17-10 Hated Cowboys. The Skins are still in this, but they've gotta get an offense going and hope Bledsoe plays poorly in the second half. I think it could turn out well for the Skins since one half is pretty much Bledsoe's limit.

Halftime Show

As my counterpart said, this has been a very ugly game so far. Neither Tom Cruise's New Best Friend nor He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named can be very happy with their teams. Hopefully the second half will go a little better for Our Beloved Redskins, but Brunell's gotta get something going. Not having Portis is hurting the Skins a lot, both on running plays and on pass blocking.

Third Quarter

13:40 The first Hated Cowboys drive is stalling, that's nice to see.

13:20 A big Hated Cowboys run negated by cheating. He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named cursing up in his luxury box high above the field. That's also nice to see. Bledsoe is making bad passes and the Hated Cowboys fans are booing. A little early to start the boos, but I'll take it.

12:20 Three and out for the Hated Cowboys to start the half. Come on Redskins! And now Cartwright picks up a stupid penalty to knock the Skins way back towards the goal line. Is Washington trying to set the record for most penalties in one game?

9:21 Nice split-screen of how much Almost God and Bitch-tits Bob have changed over the years. Ahhhh, the good old days.

7:52 This game has settled into a crapfest. Neither team is doing anything, it's three and outs every time. I really hope it's not like this for the rest of the game.

7:06 Our Beloved Redskins finally sack Bledsoe, forcing a punt and probably shattering his hip. The nurses in his retirement community won't be happy about the extra care now required.

4:38 Split-screen of Tom Cruise's New Best Friend and He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named. Snyder is watching the game through binoculars. Jones is just drinking.

4:21 Skins almost intercept a Bledsoe pass and then force a fumble on the next play! Moses' defense comes through! Okay boys, let's do something here. Tie it up.

2:55 Our Beloved Redskins down to the 21-yard line. Close enough for a field goal no matter what happens.

2:12 On the next play Brunell throws a floated interception at the goal line. Unbelievable.

2:00 The Hated Cowboys players are hooked up to some kind of machine on the sidelines. I bet that's cheating.

0:00 End of the third. Still 17-10, Hated Cowboys. Come on Skins, do something!

Fourth Quarter

14:53 Hated Cowboys score on the first play of the fourth. Easy pass from Bledsoe to Glenn. That's not what I meant when I said I wanted the Redskins to do something.

14:46 I don't want to say that the Skins are done already, but the way their offense has not been running so far this game... it might be over already. Not cool.

13:57 Shot of Southeast Jerome on the sidelines in a t-shirt. Washington needs him on the field so bad. On the plus side, though, Portis is wearing receiver's gloves anyway.

13:14 Jansen saves a Skins turnover with a false start penalty. Penalties are never good, but it's nice when they work out in your favor anyway.

12:25 I'm not sure what all this "more time in fall camp" talk from my counterpart is. Did the Redskins decided to give everyone a week off and I wasn't aware of it? I was under the assumption that every NFL team got equal time in camp.

7:47 Vanderjagt makes a long field goal. I'm about ready to turn off the game.

5:00 Okay, I'm done. There's a party going on here for two of my friends who are leaving town for a long time, so I'm going to go be social. I'm tired of seeing the Redskins offense sputter every game. Almost God needs to start getting Jason Campbell into the game more and more. Campbell is the future and I am convinced that the future needs to start now. Brunell is not getting the job done. As I'm writing this Washington has less that 90 yards passing total for the game. This is not going to cut it. Washington is now 0-2 and is last place in the division. Campbell might not be totally ready yet, but I think he'd be better than Brunell, and the sooner Campbell gets experience the better it'll be for the future life of the franchise. Something needs to be done, and once Rev. Gonna Change and Sean Springs get back to playing health I say Campbell becomes the starter. An offense with Campbell, Portis, and Moss is much scarier than one with Brunell, Portis, and Moss. The time for change is now. Bring on Campbell.

All that being said, I'd like to thank DNL for the template, Roblefko for the idea and for putting this all together, BigPPup for doing this with me, and all the readers for stopping by to check this out. The last two times i've liveblogged the Skins game they've lost. Hopefully next time will be different. Hail.

Its Redskins and Dallas week, and game day is here and ready to go. I will be your host for the evening Walker. This is going to be a heated liveblog as I face off against a deadskins fan. Nothing Im not used to seeing that I reside in D.C. and hear the belching of the Skins fans on a daily basis. Lets see if they can grasp the concepts of Al Saunders 700 page playbook... may be difficult seeing that many of the Skins star players are former employees of The U. So as we prepare for the game tonight at 8:15 Pm est, let us say a prayer. Lord, help em Lord. Lord, heal em Lord. Lord Save em Lord. Go Cowboys.

8:15 PM Welcome all to the first of what will be two games between the Dallas Cowboys, and the Skins. Before we get started, Id like to start off by thankning Roblefko for setting this up for us, and also DNL for making these great templates. That being said, without further ado... Ladies and Gentlemen Boys and Girls and children of all ages; This game is scheduled for 1 winner and has a 3 hour time limit. I weigh in tonight at an astonishing 275 pnds. I hail from Nelson County Viringia, I am d MMMMMRRRRR. WALKER Walker.

That being said buckle up cause its gonna be a heck of a ride.

Kickoff As the Boys kicked off and made a great tackle to chop down the Skins, you can tell, these teams are hyped up and ready to play. If you liked the Philly Giants game earlier, this is gonna be a barn burner

13:40 Three and out for the Skins, if Washington wants to go deep, they better find a better QB than Brunell, his arm is as limp as they go now.

13:25 First down pass to Glen working out of the slot. Since when is crackblocking illegal? This league is getting soft.

13:05 No worries on the penality, the Boys quickly find their TE's on first and long and hit up the rookie Fassano for a big gain.

12:44 Third and long, and a poor play by Bledsoe is bailed out by a holding penalty on Mike Rumph. Why did the skins pick up their defensive free agenst from teh 49ers

12:30 Ah geez here we go penalties may kill this game for both teams

11:20 Cowboys convert on third and 7, another dumpoff to a TE... and another flag.. That 3 hr time limit may not be enough.

10:29 The running game is getting started. This is great, if the Boys can establish the run early, it will force the Skins to walk guys up to the line, the Dallas can expose that weak secondary

10:25 After a pass to T.O. theres another penality on the Skins. This may be the longest ugliest drive Ive ever seen. Everyother play theres a flag

8:03 ahh TO what happened?

7:51 Yup skins are cheating again. Never trust a team that hangs with Tom Cruise

7:10 Hey its coach spanky hanky... too bad you cant find another personality who can actually play. Maybe a few more hrs in the weightroom and less time in acting classes.

6:28 Sean who? Roy Williams best Safety in football

6:25 I got it Dan Snyder thinks he's in the movie "Any Given Sunday" Thats why Steamin Willie was at the game last week....

4:50 Sean who? TO right back at it with a great third down conversion

'3:00 Terry Glen another fine reception. Best #2 ever. And look more deadskin laundry..

2:40 If Bledsoe only had half of Mike Vicks speed....

2:33 What a play action. TD Cowboys!!! and the Boys are rolling. The Stars shine Bright in the Middle of the Night

2:33 Dont you know that Joe Gibbs doesnt coach anymore? He is like pappa Joe up in Penn State, they just give him a head set and let him wander the sidelines, but its not actually plugged in or turned on

2:33 Alright boys you got em down, now stomp em. No letting up this week

1:24 I think my Cavaliers can beat this Skins team

57 Ahh thats terrible its football a Contact Sport. Thats why I quite this sport to play a real mans game rugby

45 Snyder used his MI3 connections to pay off the refs of this game... Cheating is the American way, thats why they Americas team

0:00 Cambell is the best prospect in DC and if he knows whats good he will get himself out of there. Al Saunders doesnt like him because "he cant grasp the playbook"

                       Second Quater

14:24 Skins hit a field goal, bout time Hall did something right

13:04" Third and long and good ole Jason Witten comes through. First and 10 and do it again

11:57 Whats up with our recievers. They cant catch anything

11:50 Im sick of this TO and Bledsoe dont have timing crap. He is missing Glen and Witten too, and no one talks about that. Its Bledsoe thats the problem now Owens

11:50 You know Snyder has a picture of Jones in his office, because Snyder aspires to be him one day....

11:05 The play book is too big for the players to read through...damn you Al Saunders

10:59 That timeout was put to good use....

10:38 I love exposing those weak corners... Also Nicely done DNL for he shameless plug at the bottem of the page Im all about that, visit Walker-Sports.com

8:38 TOUCHDOWN Chalk another one up for the goodguys. I like that Just run the same play 3 times in a row

8:25 I dont believe that... TD Deadskins 100 yrd return, Thats terrible

6:58 Geez, Bledsoe is gonna get someone killed out there. Looks like Carson Palmer leaving recievers out to dry

5:50 36 aint 26 What happened to all that speed during the Jacksonville days

4:48 That Roy Williams is a beast out there. Cant leave till the balls snapped dont they teach that in Skins practice? Maybe a bit more time in training camp

3:57 A punt and the good guys get the ball back

2:45 Glen has done more in his career than Rumph will do in a lifetime

2:18 Someone better block Ware or else you will see Collins in the game tonight

1:56 And Mark Brunell misses another pass... Thank God he is so bad

1:16 They said Bledsoe cant scramble.. That was legit 5.3 sec speed

55 Randle El is a poor mans Kordell Stewart

                              Halftime

This has been a very very ugly game. From the penalties, to the terrible QB play. I dont know whats wrong with Brunell, but he is definitly off his game. That being said the Dallas receivers are off their game dropping way too many pass. All in all the Cowboys have done a great job of standing strong and taking control of the game. They just need to cut down on mistakes, and not have mental letdowns after the big play

I think your forgetting that Brunell has done absolutly nothing this game. It may be past his bedtime

                 Third Quater

14:40 I think that was an okie dook by Bledsoe

13:31 GodBless, finally got a great play from the offense and a penality calls it back

12:57 They need stickum... This is terrible

12:45 I hate that play call by teams running it on third and long. Wheres Steve Spurrier when you need him

12:40 Thats why your the biggest guy in the bar. Everone moves out the way for you

10:05 Ohh now thats good pass coverage

9:00 Look at that we catch the ball, and good things happen

7:00 Ive seen this before... Thats right it was the UVA game I covered yesterday hope this ones goes better that that one did.

5:18 Skins just cant seem to win. Maybe if Jansen wasnt on Steroids he would have stayed on sides

5:10 Fractured his hip? Did you see how slow Brunell got up off the turf? Might want to worry bout your own QB

4:38 Both owners love to win... yet Snyder has only been to the playoffs once? And what about Jerry ah thats right 3 Rings

3:45 AJJJJJGjjgajgj$# Turnovers... no excuses for that ever

2:12 Picked off Dallas ball. I have to say these are the two best safties in the game. Both trying to out duel the other and right now Williams is up by an inch by stopping that TD

2:12 Cant jinx your boys now

00 Finally give the old man a few secs and he can make things happen. Big play lets make it happen.

14:43 TD Bledsoe to Glen big Touchdown pass, now we rolling

13:14 And the Skins continue to look terrible... More time in fall camp and this could have been avoided

10:15 And the Cowboys keep rolling along

8:56 Cambell is the future of the Skins. I believe your watching the changings of the guards right before your eyes. Brunell just cant play anymore

7:52 The Skins had the shortest camp in the NFL. He also only had 2 two-a-days. He also went without pads a lot of the time because of the heat. Gibbs admitted he light on his team.

7:20 Brunell has averaged 3 yrds a pass wow.... Julius has more yrds per carry on the ground

4:38 tick Tock Tick Tock time is running out for the skins

3:41 Another Cowboys sack their defense has been in the Skins backfield all evening, and its just been too much to overcome

3:40 Jerry Jones is on the sidelines, that must mean the Boys are moments away from collecting another W

                              Game End
                        Cowboys 27  Skins 10

Cowboys win Cowboys win. After a slow game Dallas handled their business and will walk out of Texas stadium with a victory. The Cowboys offense wasnt pretty but they were able to do enough to get the job done. Bledsoe had plenty of time while sitting in the pocket. This gave him time to scan the field, and show off why he was a number 1 pick at one point in time. However all the props should be given to the Cowboy offensiveline for giving Bledsoe time and opening holes for the back. Also the Dallas defense looked amazing, not allowing a TD all game. the front 7 of Dallas spent all evening in the backfield disrupting Brunell. The secondary was amazing. When Brunell was able to complete a pass, there was a DB there ready to make the hard hits. Roy Williams came up with the big play when the Boys needed it.

Now at 1-1, the Cowboys are tied with Philly and NY at the top of the division while Washington drops to 0-2. The Skins will have their hands full climbing out of this hole in a division that will be a dog fight to the end.

Once again thank you all for coming out tonight. Thanks for everyone who put in all the hard work for allowing this to happen. Thanks for Josh for sticking this one out as long as possible, have a beer for me. Tonights broadcast is brought to you by Walker-Sports.com The Chair, and Rons ribs and chicken out by the cold and quick. Have a good one everyone its been a great day as usual.