The Uggies: Ugliest Women in Sports

As usual, I spend today at work, randomly checking my usual website (SI, ProSportsDaily, SportsPickle, ESPN Page 2), when I came upon what ended up being the most interesting part of my day. Page 2 featured, to my delight, the hottest female athletes and gave us a two sentence blurb on what they do (weo were golfers!) and then something closer to a paragraph about why they are hot. Naturally, I read only a little and than oggled the picture until my boss came by. Subsequetly, I would raise a piece of paper (at one point this piece of paper was another page 2 article) and squint at it so I would look busy. This worked, since, no matter what you're doing, if you have a piece of paper in your hand and a pissed off face no one will ever question what you're doing, after all, you have a piece of paper in your hand and you look like you're pissed!

Anyways, at one point this article featured a WNBA player (WNBA!), which got me thinking about some of the more recognizable women in sports, so...

Let me present the aptly titled "Uggies" or Ugliest Women in Sports:

Tennis

Lets start with the hit or miss catagory of tennis, which has featured such beauties as Anna Kournikova

(always a winner in our hearts) or more currently Maria Sharapova

(pronounced Sha-rap-uh-va). I'll even throw Martina Hingis in their for the sake of argument, so what if you could land a plane on her forehead.

But to be honest, I had a lot to choose from in Tennis, we've got the Steffi Graf:

or the even less desirable Martina Navritalova

who is so ugly, she's now on the same team as Sam Cassell. But the top Cake taker her has got to be the crappier half of this dynamic duo... Venus Williams

She's beastly, she's ugly, she can even beat you up and thats why she comes out on top in her catagory.

I attempted to evaluate the WNBA, but I decided that this was pointless since there are basically no hot women in the there, however, if I were gay, I'd be spending a hell of a lot more time in the American West Arena, home of Diana Taurasi and many other gorgeous babes that would even make a 6 year olds balls jump back a few...

Figure Skating/Dancing

Next stop, figure skating/dancing (honestly, if I asked you for the difference, would you know?). Well, we've got the newly crowned hottie, Tanith Belbin

or...ok I don't know any others really . . . infact i barely (never) watch ice skating or any of that crap . . . so perhaps Skating with Celebrities could be considered (I heard they get better ratings), maybe Jillian Barbarie, but really, once again, no one cares...

But by far the ugliest girl of skating is...(you still don't care)...Johnny Weir

she has a penis (i guess they still don't test for that...) and skating with the boys (girls w/o boobs). She acts like a little bitch and performs with pelvic thrusts and pivets that make us ponder (who would let someone like that suck their cock?)...Listen, if you are a male figure skater...just quit...not only does no one care about you sport (regardless of gender), but i heard the soccer team has a few spots available...