The Mitchell Report Names - as read by John Facenda

by Manny "John Facenda lives inside me" Stiles

Whether you want to think I raised the "Voice of God" John Facenda from the dead, or if you think I have a computer program that simulates his voice (with special "touch under the weather" effect) or if you just think my impersonation of Frank Caliendo impersonating John Facenda sucks... we all agree: The Mitchell Report amounted to a big pile of nothing new.

Facenda and Stiles - Two of the Finest Golden Throated Journalists to ever associate with Philadelphia

Some people have said Facenda could read the phone book and make it sound interesting... hmmm. The Mitchell report was about as interesting a read as a phone book.

At least there was very few typos in the report

As if there was only ONE distributor for Major Leaguers during the 90's... OK, Senator well done. We know you have more pressing issues to deal with - now go get that Prostate cancer dealt with...

All I know is Bobby Bonilla is sitting at home thanking his lucky stars that he always paid in cash...

Anyway...

Enjoy!

Dammit!

YouTube yanked my video and didn't even bother to explain why!

Here it is!

Until the next time Congress straightens out baseball

Enjoy your Weekend of Mitchell redux!!!

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

Score 1

Holy Crap! YouTube sank my battleship!

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

Score 1

Thank God for the scruple-less bastards of Blogger!!! (Maybe we need a video uploader for AGM? - sorry, Pean)

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JuTMSY4Legend

715 days ago

Score 1

gotta get your scruples somewhere

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

Score 1

Ha!!! I took "Mitchell Report" out of the tag on Youtube and NOW it works! GTFO!

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CoreyisarealboyMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

Score 2

WTF? Is that "The Unforgiven" by Metallica?

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JuTMSY4Legend

715 days ago

Score 1

circle gets the square!

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

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It's by Apocalyptica - a Cello quartet that covered a bunch of Metallica songs. Pretty fitting, eh?

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CoreyisarealboyMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

Score 1

Why not use the Metallica version? Or will YouTube ban it because Lars Ulrich is a flaming weinie?

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

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It's to fit the NFL Films standard. It has no singing to overwhelm Facenda's buttery linguistics.

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CoreyisarealboyMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

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A string quartet named Apocalyptica that covers Metallica songs ... I'm still actually speechless about that.

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

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You probably can't imagine what my music collection is like - and that's not including homemade or Stiles-produced music.

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CoreyisarealboyMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

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I have a pretty good idea...

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Manny StilesMajor Leaguer

715 days ago

Score 1

Stiles Musical rule of thumb:

Unique, Original = Good

Popular = Not So Good

The thing about popular music is it's made to be popular and sell - that's it. I like music that was made for music's sake - the magic of waves of noise flowing in motion taking my on an aural journey - it holds it value longer and it doesn't make you squirm 15 years later when you say "Ewwww... I used to like that song"

The other thing I can't stand is music that is square and cold sounding. I NEED the flow of the song. A lot of modern music is created with Cakewalk, Pro Tools, etc. and it's just blocks of noise backed up against each other - it's like a bad computer generated image compared to a decent photograph.

I don't need "perfectly square" music. Hell, I'll take a painting over a photograph on many occasions! And don't get me started on how MP3s are the equivalent to eating a song and shitting it out.

Mother Nature makes no straight lines, I won't either.

Way to open a can of worms, Corey... Maybe I need to hit up music.wikia sometime soon?

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