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The Following ALSO Appears on 38Pitches.com (Probably)

9
Vote

by user Kopechcr

The Chris Kopech

http://sportselitists.blogspot.com

I'm a Red Sox fan but I do have my problems with Curt Schilling and his approach to, well, everything. Don't get me wrong, 6-2 is a great start, but let's see what happens when he's busy blogging during a start and gives up a no-hitter in the ninth. Wait...


38 Pitches

Curt Schilling's Official Blog

Image:38pitches.jpg

9/7/2007 Vs. Oakland

June 7th, 2007 by Curt Schilling

Man, I hate these West Coast swings. It was so much better when I was in Arizona, then we were everyone else's west coast swing! Oh well. I have to pitch today so I need to make sure that I go through my traditional pre-start routine. Here it is, but I'm sure a lot of you already know this (lol!)

-Make day's first blog entry (done)

-Brush teeth with Colgate's new Dunkin' Donuts flavored tooth paste.

-Call agent to make sure I'm getting royalties from both Colgate and Dunkin' Donuts (who, incidentally, makes the world's best coffee; it's what Curt drinks to get ready to win another ring for the Sox [/winks])

-Drink large cup of Dunkin' Donuts coffee ([/winks again])

-Bow down and pray before xeroxed absentee ballot from 2004 general election with PRESIDENT Bush's name circled (love that guy!)

-Leave for ballpark.

Since I'm in a hotel, I had to substitute the ballot for the wallet-sized photo of me and Jeb Bush that we took last time I was in Florida. I hope it works just as well. Well, it's time to go, so I'll check in after my start. Go Sox.

* Top of the 6th...

Hey everyone, I thought I'd try to get in a quick word while we're batting. You know, I've said it before and I'll say it again, but we gotta get rid of the Lugo guy. I'm just not buying him on this team. He's just so different. I mean we're no longer this bunch of idiots and all he does is hang around Manny and chew gum and play pepper. You're not allowed to play pepper! It says so right on the sign! UGH! And that error on the grounder? Let's just say it's a good think he's not sitting anywhere near me right now. In fact, no one is. That's odd. Well, time to get back out there.

* After the game...

For those of you who weren't watching, I'll give you the recap: I ALMOST THREW A NO-HITTER! But I screwed it up with two outs. Tek wanted a slider and I shook him off. I was simply following the example of my President like when he shook off the Iraq Study Group's report. It worked for him but not for me. Well, like Alanis Morrisette says: you live you learn. In my defense, that Lugo idiot could have probably gotten to that ball (I know I could have!!) but I guess I'll let it go. But I'll tell you what, throwing a no-hitter would have been great, but the words "President John McCain and Vice President John Boehner" sound a whole lot better. Well that's it everyone. Time to hit the showers and get to the plane. Thanks for reading! God bless and Go Sox!

For the Internets's best Sports Commentary, head over to The Sports Elitists .


Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
Davis21wylieMVP
932 days ago
Score 2+-
Sounds like somebody's been reading too much Shaughnessy...
Permalink | Reply
DrpatriotAll-American
932 days ago
Score 0+-
Let's not talk about He Who Must Not Be Named here. That said, I was a little disappointed to see the results past that link.
Permalink
KopechcrSoccer Kid
931 days ago
Score 0+-
I was going more for the gag in general and not making fun of Schilling like DS did.
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