Sunday Serenade

by Warden

It's Halftime for most of the 1:00 NFL games now, and already by my decidedly unofficial count, we've seen three long touchdowns via return -- two standard kickoff returns by the Jets' Leon Washington and Maurice Jones-Drew of Jacksonville, and one 109-yard return of a missed field goal by San Diego's Antonio Cromartie -- the longest play in NFL history. And that's only midway through the early games. [1] Sooooo nice to see No. 2 Boston College get beat last night by Florida State -- dashing their championship dreams as well as the Heisman hopes of QB Matt Ryan. As I said, anything New England-related and I wish it the absolute worst short of death by immolation. For now...

My nephew P.J. is down in Miami on vacation, and he left me a message Friday night telling me he just met Hall of Famer Michael Irvin and couldn't get over what a nice, down to earth guy he is. Hell, I could've told him that. He was the glue that held those Super Bowl teams together.

Funny thing. A few weeks ago I had jotted down in one of my trusty Steinway & Sons memo pads that Bob's wife, my friend Holly, supplies me with (which I have dubbed my Acoustic BlackBerries), that Amani Toomer is now the Giants' all-time record holder for Touchdown passes caught with only 49. I thought that was a pretty shabby amount for a franchise that's been around seemingly since just after the Crimean Wa r. But I never got around to it writing about it here on Warden's World. Then I pick up The Onion the other day (Nov. 1-7 issue) and in their sports section is the following: "Amani Toomer Breaks Giants' All-Time Receiving Touchdown Record With 14." So you see, warped minds think alike.

[2] Just to put it in perspective, or what others might call belaboring the point, the Dallas Cowboys leaders in the same category are: Bob Hayes with 71, the aforementioned Mike Irvin with 65, then Tony Hill with 51, Frank Clarke with 50, and Drew Pearson with 48. Not only did all these players' careers span fewer years than Toomer, who's been a steady player for 12 years now, but the Cowboys franchise came into the NFL as an expansion team in 1960, with no extra draft picks, just castoffs from other players. And I'm sure most other teams have receivers who caught well more than 50 TDs holding their records.

Which is a roundabout way of saying the Giants have not had that many teams that were offensive juggernauts through the years. Even on their two Super Bowl winning teams, which were obviously driven by the defensive side of the ball, the receivers were below average. Granted, they had a great tight end in Mark Bavaro, but the WR position was manned by the likes of Earnest Gray, Stephen Baker, Bobby Jackson and Mark Ingram. Factoring in that Phil Simms played in one of the windiest and coldest stadiums for all those years, as well as who he was throwing to, and maybe he should be reconsidered for the Hall after all.

Chris Russo, know-it-all loudmouth heard daily in New York on WFAN sports radio, has picked 23 NFL games against the spread this season, and has come up a winner but six times! However, that 6-17 record will in no way impinge on his making hundreds more debatable observations on his next show that as always confuse his own opinion with objective fact, with a degree of absolute certainty commonly found among the truly mentally ill.

[3] Have you heard those lame-ass radio spots for the Versus Network featuring Dennis Miller? He's apparently for some ungodly reason being given yet another chance to fail with a talk show on that obscure cable channel. But if the ads contain material that they are highlighting, I can only cringe at what the outtakes contained. On the promos I heard on WFAN, one of the "jokes" Miller launches goes as follows: "You know, calling football players student-athletes is like calling Doctor J an MD." I'm not kidding. Then it's this beaut: "Reading the sports pages these days is as painful as watching Britney Spears dance." Good god, man, stop. But he doesn't.

"Of all the sports on Versus," sellout Miller intones in that by now nauseatingly canned delivery, "I know the least about bull riding. Now, bullshitting -- that's my stock in trade." And mercifully the commercial eventually ends. Now based off this painfully wooden attempt at comedy, who in their right mind would tune in for more of Miller's trademark scripted "ad-libs"? I'm guessing not a lot of people.

Simms1156Div-I Stud

757 days ago

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The Giants have never had a dominant reciever and one of the reasons for that is that they have usually been a run dominant team. If Plaxico would have been with the Giants his whole carreer he would obliterate that 49 touchdown record.

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WardenVarsity

757 days ago

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No doubt about that. That's why it's hard to compare QBs who play in different systems. Dome teams versus outdoor, bad weather teams. Randy Moss may reach 49 this season, or at the least obliterate the single season mark.

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