Saints Go on 13 Game Winning Streak: Written By Overly Confident and Perhaps Slightly Delusional Saints Chick
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by Nola Chick
"Remember that time the Saints started 0-3, had a bye week, then went on to win their next 13 games, clinch the division, run the board in the playoffs, and go to the Super Bowl?"
That's the question we Saints Chicks hope to be asking each other in about 40 years during a weekly meeting of our botox/book club while our young, strapping Puerto Rican lovers strum "La Vida Loca" on acoustic guitars. It's enough to make us teary eyed.
Can it happen? Hell yeah, getting a studly gigolo is easy when you're living off your rich dead husband's money. Oh wait, you mean the Saints thing. Well yeah, that can happen too.
But it can't happen without a win on Sunday. Fresh off a bye week, the Saints return to the Dome to tussle with a banged up division rival: The Carolina Panthers. We can all but "ga-ron-tee" the Ragin' Cajun Jake Delhomme " won't be starting due to the major ouchy on his elbow. So that leaves Carolina's offense in the hands of David Carr. (Awe Santa, you DID get our letters!)
Carr's best known for being an even more disappointing version of Joey Harrington. Still, a world class receiver like Steve Smith has the potential to make the likes of Aaron Brooks, Rex Grossman, Brian Griese, and yes, even David Carr look like Joe Montana on a good day. And I think we all know what's happened to the Saints' secondary the past few weeks. (Wait, what is that smell? Oh nevermind, it's just Jason David getting burned again.)
The good (or bad news) is that David is out for a while, which means look out for the return of Fred "Like Toast" Thomas. After putting in some quality reflection time on the bench, maybe F.T. will find himself up to the challenge of effectively defending a pass play. Sunday will provide the embattled Saint a fresh opportunity to earn back the respect of his fans (and his parents, who we hear have changed their last names to "Thompson.")
Then, there's the other black and gold elephant in the room, the loss of #26. While many see Deuce McAllister's injury as a major blow to the Saints offense, we see it as a point of unification for the team. What better way to motivate their teammate on his long road to recovery than by kicking ass like Amy Winehouse on her husband for the next 2 months. Old Slogan: Earn it. New Slogan: Do it for Deuce!
(Should we even mention the offensive line? Or just end on a positive note?) Oh what the hell, we're on a roll.
So the Swiss Cheese O-line didn't look so hot against the Titans last Monday. (Yeah, we know, Saints Fans. Always bringing up old $hit...) At any rate, they've had two weeks to watch tape, rest up, and get serviced by a Bourbon St. she-male (if that's what they're into, no judgement...) They were one of the top rated lines in the league in 2006. The faces on that line haven't dramatically changed, so why should the talent level? We'll call the Monday Night Mess a fluke (and, well...the two weeks before it too.) Remember, they've got new motivation. DO IT FOR DEUCE!!!
C'mon, we've all watched enough cliched sports flicks to know how this thing can go. Major underdog, inspired by some great tragedy, suddenly overcomes tremendous odds. Hello...the death of Mickey in Rocky III...the death of Apollo Creed in Rocky IV... Rocky being really old, wrinkly, and unintelligible in that last Rocky movie. Um, do we really need anymore proof?
Starting Sunday, it's the dawn of the "Newer", "New" New Orleans Saints Era. How can we be so confident? Because for N'awlins folks right now, 0-4 is like those southern accents on K-ville ; just plain ole wrong.
