Pean's Favorite Athlete Cameos
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by user Pean
Athletes appear in endorsements all the time -- for the good (Tom Brady, Derek Jeter) and the bad (Bronson Arroyo, Jason Giambi, John Starks - anyone remember the Wiz Bucks commercial with him and Charles Oakley? ). However, their appearances on actual TV shows and movies have produced some classic moments. Below are some of my favorite athlete cameos. I am sure I left out some obvious choices, so please don't be a jerkstore when pointing them out. Here they are in no particular order.
Cam Neely (as Sea Bass in Dumb and Dumber)
According to his IMDB Bio, Neely is good friends with the Farrely Brothers. This would explain his awesome cameo appearance in their 1994 comedy staring Jim Carey and Jeff Daniels. Neely plays "Sea Bass", an apparent expert fisherman the main characters (Harry and Lloyd) meet at a rest stop restaurant along the highway. His confrontational behavior creates one of my favorite quotes in the movie "Kick his Ass Sea Bass!" Neely did a great job in the role, and I didn't even know it was him the first time I watched the movie. By the way, how the heck did that bathroom stall door knock him out cold when Harry came crashing in with his foot on fire?
Joe Montana (as "Sincere Guy Stu" on a skit when hosting SNL on January 24th, 1987)
Several athletes have hosted SNL over the years, but Joe Montana should be remembered as the funniest just because of this one skit. Basically, Joe plays a character named Stu who has a roommate with a girl over. As they both want Stu to go to sleep in order to have some privacy, you hear everyone's thoughts. The roommate and girlfriend keep thinking the opposite of what they say. Here is part of the transcript. Hearing Joe Montana say his last two lines are simply fantastic.
- Dan: Leslie was gonna sleep in the living room. Unless thats a problem for you? In which case, she could sleep in my room, and I could sleep on the floor.
- Dan's Thoughts: Come on, you idiot! Help me out!
- Leslie: You know, maybe it would be better if I stayed in Dan's room, because we don't want to inconvenience you.
- Stu: Hey, it's fine with me if you stay in the living room. It won't bother me at all.
- Stu's Thoughts: It's fine with me if she stays in the living room. It doesn't bother me at all.
- Dan: Thanks a lot, Stu.
- Dan's Thoughts: Yeah, thanks a lot, jerk!
- Leslie: You know, you are so sweet.
- Leslie's Thoughts: Boy, is this guy lame!
- Dan: Well, listen, Stu, I think Leslie and I are gonna stay up a while and talk, so I guess we'll.. uh.. see you tomorrow.
- Stu: Great! See you tomorrow!
- Stu's Thoughts: Great! I'll see them tomorrow!
- [ Stu heads upstairs ]
- Leslie: Uh.. listen, we'll talk quietly, so as not to disturb you, okay?
- Stu: Oh, you won't disturb me. I'll be in my room masturbating.
- Stu's Thoughts: They won't disturb me. I'll be masturbating.
O.J. Simpson (as Det. Nordberg in "Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!")
Before OJ was killing people with knives, he was killing people's stomachs with laughter as Detective Nordberg in the 1988 comedy staring Leslie Neilson (Although he was in all three Naked Gun movies, I only know the first the best since I have seen it the most). Two great scenes to take away from this performance. In the beginning of the movie, Nordberg is seriously roughed up every way imagineable during his investigation of a drug operation. He is shot multiple times, and ends up taking a dive into a harbor. At the end of the film, Nordberg is in a wheelchair in the stands of an Angels game. Frank Drebin (Neilson's character) pats him on the back, sending him speeding down the aisle, only to flip over the railing towards the field. Hilarity. How can this man possibly have been guilty?
Keith Hernandez (as himself in "The Boyfriend", a 1992 two part episode of Seinfeld)
As a big Yankee fan, I have to give props to ex-Met Keith Hernandez in one of my all-time favorite episodes of Seinfeld. Jerry meets Keith at a health club, and they start hanging out (although Jerry treats it like a male-crush). Eventually, Hernadez goes out with Elaine, leading to this classic exchange.
- Keith: You know I hate to brag about it but I did win 11 straight gold gloves, I wouldn't have brought it up but since you mentioned it.
- Elaine: I didn't mention it.
- Keith: Well I won them anyway.
- Elaine: Well so what?, I mean you played 1st base , I mean they always put the worst player at 1st base, that's where they put me and I stunk.
- Keith: Elaine You don't know the 1st thing about 1st base.
- Elaine: Oh well I know something about getting to 1st base,and I know You'll never be there.
- Keith: The way I see it Iv'e already been there, and I plan on rounding second tonight at around 11:00.
- Elaine: Well I'd watch the 3rd base coach if I were you, Cause I don't think He's waving you in.
Reggie Jackson (as himself in "Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!")
Reggie didn't exactly provide an Oscar winning performance -- he's mostly on this list due to awkardness. During a game playing for the Angel's, Reggie becomes hyptnotized, thus thinking he has to shoot the Queen who is in attendance. Walking towards the stands, he picks up a gun from under a base, and starts walking like a robot muttering "I must kill...the queen". What can be funnier than that? A fat chick falling out of the stands, landing on Reggie and thwarting his plans!
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar ( as Murdock (as Kareem Abdul-Jabaar) in Airplane!)
Kareem has played himself in several TV and movie roles (including Fletch, Full House, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Scrubs, and one of my personal favorites, Baseketball), but I think his best work was in the 1980 comedy "Airplane!" as the co-pilot. Here is a transcript:
- Joey: Wait a minute. I know you. You're Kareem Abdul-Jabar. You play basketball for the Los Angeles Lakers.
- Roger Murdock: I'm sorry son, but you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Roger Murdock. I'm the co-pilot.
- Joey: You are Kareem. I've seen you play. My dad's got season tickets.
- Roger Murdock: I think you should go back to your seat now Joey. Right Clarence?
- Captain Oveur: Nahhhhhh, he's not bothering anyone, let him stay here.
- Roger Murdock: But just remember, my name is ROGER MURDOCK. I'm an airline pilot.
- Joey: I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense. And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try... except during the playoffs.
- Roger Murdock: The hell I don't. LISTEN KID. I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes.
Brett Favre (as himself in "Something About Mary)
Brett is rather awkward in the film, but I had to put him on here just for Stiller's line at the end of the movie.
- Ted: What about Brett Fav... ruh?
Corey also pointed out this great scene with Matt Dilon.
- Pat Healy: What the hell is Brett Favre doing here?
- Brett Favre: I'm in town to play the Dolphins, you dumb ass.
Honorable Mentions
- Shaq and Penny Hardaway in Blue Chips
- Roger Clemens in Kingpin
- Paul O'Neill on Seinfeld
What are your favorites?
Date
Wed 07/12/06, 6:47 pm EST
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