Note to Tim Donaghy: Please Kill Yourself
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by Bernard9119
Bernard McShaughnessy
Looks like Bernard just got a karmic kick in the junk for wishing that shamed ref Tim Donaghy had swayed the 2006 NBA Finals away from our man Dirk, because, as it turns out, Donaghy worked Game 3 of the ill-fated Spurs-Suns Western Conference Semis -- a series that smacked of anything but two teams actually proving who was better by playing basketball.
This makes me feel ... like I have a cocaine addled badger living in my stomach ... he really wants to get out and it feels just awesome.
The main issue at bar is the fact that Amare Stoudemire -- for whom the Spurs have never had any defensive answer -- was only able to play 21 minutes in that game, due to foul trouble.
Putting a guy in foul trouble is an extremely effective way to control a game if you are a referee -- if guys aren't on the court, they obviously cannot help their team either win a game, or cover the spread, for that matter.
After that game, Suns coach Mike D'Antoni had this to say:
"[Amare] played good. He was trying to play basketball. He thought he had a clean block. It was definitely frustrating that we couldn't keep him on the floor. He needs to avoid some of the little stuff, but a couple of things were a little close and they just went against us today."
I remember these bogus foul calls. I remember them well. I also remember the Spurs beating the hell out of the Suns, physically, and never being called for it.
These are things that Bernard remembers.
Moving on, Amare was also very effective that night, scoring a point a minute (21) -- so, it might have been nice if he'd been able to play another 10-15 minutes in a game the Suns lost by 7 points ... also, it would have been even nicer, considering that winning that game would have effectively re-gained home court advantage for the Suns.
Yeah, would have been nice.
Just like it would have been nice if the refs had T-ed up the Celtics for calling a phantom time out when they had none in the '76 Finals.
Just like it would have been nice if John Paxon hadn't been left wide open in '93's game 6, or Mario Elie in '95's game 7 ... I'm going to puke up the badger.
I'm not even shocked by this stuff, anymore. I'm just sort of amused.
I wonder how Jesus is going to stop the Suns from succeeding in the playoffs next year? Is Kobe Bryant going to turn into a velociraptor and violently devour Steve Nash at center court (possibly the only means by which the Lakers could actually defeat the Suns in a 7 game series)?
Ok, so I'm not actually amused.
So ... I'm cock-poundingly mad.
I want to find Tim Donaghy and eviscerate him with the business end of a Narwhal.
"Eviscerate" is a quality word. I should use it more often.
Berniscerate
p.s. Please check out The Life And Times of Bernard, if you have not already done so. It is updated several times, daily. Cheers.
