Michael Irvin...Shut Up!
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by user LastRow
Leave it to Michael Irvin never to be left without an opinion on something…It’s good to see the NFL has a version of Stephen A. Smith. One Stephen is just never enough! Throughout his playing days, whether it be at “The U”, to suiting up for the Dallas Cowboys, to his post football days trying to impersonate a decent football analyst, one thing has remained the same. His mouth is always open like a 7-11…Can somebody please buy him a couple hundred Slurpys so it can close! Even 7-11 closes down at some point!
Although it’s safe to say that if Irvin wasn’t like this, he would’ve never been a product of the University of Miami…And we all know how privileged it is to play football there. All one needs to play there is a couple glocks, have the ability to pack and be able to run a 4.4 40 or faster in the process to flee police. You meet this, hell you’re in! See Michael could do both, so it was a no brainier! So how on earth with a man with many skeletons in his closet can decide to try clean another man’s closet. This is the case when he said on Wednesday that UM Coach Larry Coker should be replaced at the end of the season and that it would make sense to bring back two familiar names -- Butch Davis as coach and Gary Stevens as offensive coordinator. It would also make sense for you to shut your cake hole, but that isn’t ever going to happen!
I love the program, and to see it in this situation hurts, Irvin said. ``It's unacceptable. It's time to make a change. I don't say that with any malice. Larry Coker is a great man. The only reason why it hurts is because you can’t handle when people spit their thoughts at you dogging “The U”…It just hurts your ego! You love to spit at people, but when people spit back at you, well the tune changes, right? Just like when Tiki Barber spit back at you for questioning his retirement…Calling him selfish! Tiki fired back and called you an “idiot”! No Mike, hate to inform you, that would be you…Selfish and an idiot, so I guess that would make you a “Selfish Idiot, my man! There’s a surprise!
Don’t tell me, I’m just guessing you thought Donna Schala handled the “brawl” incident very well too by not “throwing nobody under the bus”…That one game suspension fit the crime, didn’t it Michael, or was it too harsh? Nevertheless, we all know you blame Coker for it, when in fact you would’ve done the exact same thing in your day down there too!
I want someone who will bring in a pro-style offense, Irvin said. ``I need an offensive coordinator that's a disciplinarian,' as Irvin endorsed re-hiring Stevens.” I was unaware, haven’t been watching television much the last couple days, (because I’m sick of seeing all the D-Wade & Lebron James commercials) but since where did college football programs start employing General Managers? For somebody who can’t even pick the games against Boomer & T.J. on Sunday’s right, now you’re going to tell us what you need to see out of your alma mater…Yeah, your opinion comes with a lot of thought behind it. I’ll overlook that though…What should I expect, you’re a product of “The U”, where you played football. Everybody knows you didn’t go to class, even if you would’ve I think you would be smarter to say, “Bring back Stevens.”…Thanks for proven that theory correct! Um Mike, in case you hadn’t noticed, Stevens now is out of coaching….I’m guessing there’s a reason for that. Perhaps he took over the Bed & Breakfast that the Oakland Raider’s offensive coordinator left vacant…Come Mike, you should know that, I though you covered the NFL?
What’s next? You’ll be endorsing the return of Lamar Thomas to the broadcast booth…After all, he was made the scape goat, right? Oh no, your second order of duty as the new Miami Hurricanes Football General Manager is to call on UM to hire Davis, he said, ``I think Butch would be fine. I like Butch as a coach and recruiter . . . He has history. I want someone who can explain to these kids the honor, the privilege it is to play at this university. Yeah, another brilliant decision, considering he’s out of coaching too! Exactly what kind of honor & privilege to play for “The U”? Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think being referred to as a “CONVICT” is that of a privilege? Maybe you think that’s a privilege, but I think it’s safe to say many might tend to disagree with you “Playmaker”! Although, you may look at is as such considering that’s what you are…Having a rap sheet & everything, but I ‘d have to take a pass, sorry. Besides, what’s so honorable about that? Those two words shall & will never be associated with University of Miami Football!
Irvin wondered, Are we getting the most out of the talent? Someone said Coker doesn't have many first-rounders. I said, `Whose fault is that?' You have to groom them into first-rounders. You know Mike, that’s the same thing we all say at home when we see your ugly mug on TV in the fall. We wonder how in the hell you landed on ESPN, sharing a set with dignified individuals, such as Berman, TJ, Steve Young, Jaws, and of course Coach Ditka. Although it’s easy to figure out why, ESPN didn’t have to groom you into anything, you were and always will be a clown…A perfect fit you and ESPN! Thank You for proving yet again how senseless you really…I would’ve thought lying on The Vet’s green surface would’ve knocked some sense into you, but how silly was I to think that? Nobody who’s involved with Miami Football has any common sense! Stick with what you know at ESPN...Oh, that's right, you don't know shit!
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