Mean Machine Lands Five Million Dollar Back
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by user LastRow
Yes it’s time for football season again folks and that could only mean one thing. It’s a perfect opportunity to add another chapter to Maurice Clarett's best-selling biography “How to Ruin Your Life”. Let me just say that it’s one of my personal favorites. I just can’t wait until the story goes Hollywood. After Jamie Foxx fell on his face in Miami Vice, he’d be the perfect one to play Maurice. Miami Vice, don’t they usually carry a lot of guns around? Well shit then, perfect fits don’t get any better than this one. Just make note, I want at least 10 percent of the commission since it was my idea in the first place.
So Clarett's latest run-in with the law began when police noticed an SUV driving erratically in the early morning hours on Wednesday…Oh don’t mind that. It was just his other personality coming out…Better known as the Goose as in Gray Goose A highway chase ensued, ending when police spiked Clarett's tires, sending his vehicle limping into a restaurant parking lot. Officers said they could not easily subdue Clarett because the bulletproof vest he was wearing thwarted their stun guns. It took several police using pepper spray to get the 6-foot, 245-pounder into handcuffs. Who knew they made bulletproof vest that big for a “Goose”? Just as any good American would, Mo was kicking and screaming as he resisted arrest…Good to see the one year at OSU raised your maturity level to that of a six year old…Usually that’s the ones who throw temper tantrums. Gee, hope they let you suck on your thumb on the way to the slammer.
Seems as if you should’ve stuck around OSU’s campus for one more year…You missed a very valuable lesson which can only be learned as a sophomore. The Lesson: (continued @ http://www.lastrowsports.com/weekly-boob.asp)
Date
Fri 08/11/06, 3:09 pm EST
