MLB: Whos’ Your Daddy
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by user Josh Q. Public
Josh Q. Public: By the time I was ten, playing baseball got to be like eating vegetables or taking out the garbage. So when I was 14, I started to refuse. Could you believe that? An American boy refusing to play catch with his father. -Field of Dreams
Public Service Announcement: OK, here we go! To all the father’s in the house. Like my main Harmon Killebrew always says: My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, You’re tearing up the grass. We’re not raising grass, Dad would reply. We’re raising boys. Where the boys are, where the boys are. Where the boys are, someone waits for me. The boys are at the ballfield. That’s where they are. Over one hundred father-and-son combinations have made it to the big leagues. Some fathers even had more than one son who played. But there were planes to catch and bills to pay, he learned to walk while I was away. And he was talkin’ ‘fore I knew it, and as he grew he’d say: I’m gonna be like you dad. You know I’m gonna be like you. So here’s to all the fathers who had sons who grew up like you dad, you know they grew up like you.
Here’s to Sandy Alomar. Alomar was Nolan Ryan’s second baseman in the first two of the Hall of Fame pitcher’s seven no-hitters. Sandy is the father of both Sandy Jr. and Bobby Alomar. And if that weren’t enough. Too much is never enough. At least for me, anyway. If that weren’t enough, get a load of this: Alomar also turned a double play on a Felipe Alou ground ball for the final outs of Clyde Wright ’s no-hitter back in 1970. So what, you say. Who cares, you say. Well, like Alomar, Wright and Alou also had sons who would play in the Major Leagues. Major Leagues: When these three oddballs try to play hardball, the result is totally screwball. Wright and Alou also had sons: Jaret and Moises. Cool, right? No? How ’bout this? Sandy’s elder son Sandy Jr., Jaret Wright and Moises Alou all participated in the 1997 World Series. Wow! How about that! Here’s to a catcher. Here’s to Bob Boone. Four time All-Star. You may be my lucky star, but I’m the luckiest by far. I’m lucky to have witnessed the best defensive catcher ever. The best I ever seen. The best there’s ever been. A regular catching machine. In 1977, this cat committed only eight errors and allowed only three passed balls. Yowza! Bob is the father of Aaron and Brett Boone. Bob’s father, Ray, also played in the Show. Also was ready to go. Go cat go. Happy grandfather’s day Ray!
Here’s to Joe Niekro. King of the knuckleball. Guard your grill, knuckle up. I ain’t the type to give up, guard your grill, knuckle up. I smoke first, so what’s up? Guard your grill, knuckle up. Knuckling up to twenty-one wins in 1979. Knuckling up to a ten inning, shutout masterpiece in Game Three of the NLCS for the Houston Astros. Houston Astros. Houston Astros. Houston Astros, number one! I know, but still. Joe is the father of first baseman Lance Niekro.
Here’s to Diego Segui. I remember Diego as a Red Sox. I remember his baseball card. I remember putting his baseball card in my bike spokes. I remember when he pitched for Seattle in his final season. I remember they called him the Ancient Mariner. Water, water, everywhere, and all the boards did shrink. Water, water, everywhere, nor any drop to drink. Diego is the Father of David Segui.
Here’s to Maurice Morning Wills. Maury. What’s the story morning glory? Well, you need a little time to wake up. Wake up. Maury woke up. Woke up and stole his way into the record books. Woke up and stole his way into our hearts. Groove is in the heart. Ah-ah-ah-ah. Groove is in the heart. Groovin’ his way to 107 stolen bases in one season. Groovin’ his way to an All-Star Game MVP. Groovin’ his way to an NL MVP and two Gold Gloves. Glove, exciting and new. Come aboard, we’re expecting you. Glove, life’s sweetest reward. Let it flow, it floats back to you. Maury is the father of the inimitable Bump Wills.
Here’s to Jeff Burroughs. Power hitter. The epitome of the power hitter. Tower of a power hitter. Power to the people. Power to the people, right on! Right on Jeff. One of only four Major League Baseball number-one draft picks to win the MVP Award. Jeff is the father of Little League World Series champ and big league ball player, Sean Burroughs.
Here’s to Pedro Borbon. Relief pitcher. Fireman. We didn’t start the fire. It was always burning since the world’s been turning. We didn’t start the fire. No we didn’t light it, but we tried to fight it. Pedro Borbon fought the fire back in 1976. Fought the fire for the Cincinnati Reds. Fought the fire pitching 4 and 1/3 scoreless innings during the National League Championship Series back in 1976. Pedro is currently the pitching coach for the Cedar Rapids Kernels. He is the father of Pedro Borbon Jr.
Here’s to Tony Armas. Another cat I remember from his Red Sox days. Hitting home runs in his Red Sox days. A slew of home runs. A gaggle of home runs. A plethora of home runs. From 1980 to 1985, Armas hit more bombs than any other player in the American League. Sexbomb sexbomb, you’re my sexbomb. And baby, you can turn me on. Baby, you can turn me on. Tony Armas is the father of Tony Armas Jr.
Here’s to Don Buford. Handy Dandy Don Buford played for the Chicago White Sox. Handy Dandy Don Buford played for the Baltimore Orioles. Handy Dandy, he’s got a stick in his hand and a pocket full of money. Handy Dandy got 99 problems and scoring runs ain’t one. In each of the Orioles’ three pennant-winning seasons, Buford scored 99 runs. He led the American League in runs in 1971. Don is the father of Damon Buford.
Here’s to Jose Tartabull. Fast. Fast like lightning. Now you can’t catch me, baby you can’t catch me. ‘Cause if you get too close, you know I’m gone like a cool breeze. You couldn’t catch Jose Tartabull. One of the fastest men in the American League. He got down the line from home to first in 3.4 seconds. 3.4 seconds, that’s fast. Jose is the father Danny Tartabull.
Paul Trout. Dizzy Trout. You make me dizzy Miss Lizzy. The way you rock’n'roll. You make me dizzy Miss Lizzy. When you do the stroll. Dizzy Trout rock’n'rolled. Rock’n'rolled with the Detroit Tigers. Rock’n'rolled way back in 1943 as he led the league with twenty wins. Rock’n'rolled way back in 1944 as he won twenty-seven games and posted the lowest ERA in the Show. It’s Love, Brother Love, say Brother Love’s Traveling Salvation Show. Pack up the babies and grab the old ladies and ev’ryone goes, ’cause everyone knows. Everyone knows way back in 1945, Dizzy won eighteen games and led the Tigers to win the World Series. Everyone knows Dizzy is the father of Steve Trout.
So many father & sons, so little time.
Public Acknowledgements: Harry Chapin, ' Madonna, ' Naughty By Nature, Oasis, Dee-Lite, Aaron Spelling, John Lennon, Billy Joel, Tom Jones, Bob Dylan, Jay-Z, Chuck Berry, Beatles and Neil Diamond.
Happy Father’s Day Everybody!
Snickers and muddled giggles to Pete and re-Pete Rose, Ted and John Henry Williams.
Special shot out to Bart and Paul Giamatti?