Living a Rap Video, J.R. Smith Style (Readable Version)
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by Laredoslider
I love watching rap videos. They usually have scenes, in slow motion, of rappers spilling Moet (from now on, I refer to Moet as Mo'), on girls (from now on, I refer to girls, as ho's), in the club (from now on, the club, is da club).It's a fantasy world that not all rappers can afford to live in, but they portray. Twenty-one year old N.B.A. shooting guards can afford the rap video lifestyle, and copy it like the hottest Lil' Wayne mixtape.
J.R. Smith has had a tough year. It started going bad with the brawl in N.Y. (George Karl, that's what you get for running up the score on the Knicks, go have another donut), then he was benched in the playoff series against the Spurs, and got called out publicly by his coach. He was involved in a car crash, in New Jersey, that killed his best friend. Then, last week, J.R. went to da club, and spilled Mo' on some ho. Well, he did more than that. He channeled the "professional" J.R. Smith and attempted to apologize to the ho, only to have "drunk asshole" J.R. Smith recite some Three 6 Mafia (which is the Bible in the J.R. Smith household, and in da club). According to the police report, he was about to apologize then "he (Smith) changed attitude and spit on her, used his hand to push her face, and tore her dress." Also according to the police report, Isaiah Thomas then tried to pull off a trade with the Nuggets half and hour later, and sexually assaulted the whole female population of Denver (that didn't happen). This is a guy who said before this event that "his whole outlook on life has changed". Yeah, his outlook has changed because he isn't drinking the cheap stuff anymore (it's a different kind of drunk on Mo'...Mad Dog 20/20 and Old English just makes a mo'fo wanna fight). He also said "he was very drunk and doesn't remember anything" (no, this wasn't a quote after game four of the Spurs series last year). If you are a team who is looking to get a player with a lot of talent, cheap, here's your guy. The only thing keeping him in Denver is his talent, and the fact that he is a perimeter scorer. Honestly, I hope that this isn't an event in a string of events, which lead to the early end of his career (it seems like a headline out of the Eddie Griffin file). Hey, J.R.!!! Wakeup and get your head, out of your ass!!!
