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Just Win Baby! The New England patriots

12
Vote

by user Josh Q. Public



Josh Q. Public: Are you ready? Are you ready for this? Are you hanging on the edge of your seat? -Queen

Public Service Announcement:

OK, here we go! Roll Pats, roll! Your faith was strong but you needed proof. Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Leonard Cohen style. Is that enough proof for ya? Huh? Is it? I had to wait a little bit for this one. Let it sit in for this one. Soak up all that good gravy for this one. Get all that flavor that you savor. Watch all the highlights ad nauseum. Watch LT cry like a little girl. Over and over. Makes it that much sweeter. Here is what the good folks over at Barstool Sports had to say about the Touchdown Maker’s antics:

I sort of equate it to wrestling. You can’t have a signature dance or prop and not expect it to get used against you if things go bad. I mean the Honky Tonk Man knew there was always a chance that somebody would take his guitar and smash it over his head. If you’re going to perform a sack dance every two seconds and run your mouth about how you’re going to knock out Tom Brady then be prepared for the consequences if you lose. That’s exactly what happened.

I couldn’t have said it better myself. Yes I could have, but they thought of it first.

What can Brown do for you? Win football games. That’s what. Football players play football. Players make plays. Troy Brown plays football. Troy Brown makes plays. Troy Brown has been playing football for the New England Patriots for fourteen seasons. Troy Brown has been making plays in nineteen playoff appearances. Sunday he made another play. A big one. We are Marshall! Sunday, Troy Brown made the biggest play of the game. You saw it. When you saw it, was it then you knew the game was over? All over. Was it then you heard Johnny Most in your little head? Heard Johnny Most saying: “And there’s a steal by Bird, over to D.J.“ Richard Seymour: “If there’s one guy I look up to, it’s Troy Brown.” That makes two of us Richard, that makes two of us.

Bend don’t break baby, bend don’t break. Let’s hear it for the defense. It seemed like every drive, the Chargers were in Patriots territory. Push ‘em back, hit ‘em hard, make ‘em fight for every yard! It seemed like every drive, the Chargers came up short. Maybe that’s what LT should be crying about. The Patriots are the best defense in the red zone. The Patriots are the second best defense in points allowed. Bend don’t break baby, bend don’t break!

Richard Seymour looks up to Troy Brown. Me too. I also look up to Mr. Tom Brady. I’m not the only one. Heath Evans: “That’s Tom Brady. He’s the one guy we don’t ever worry about.” No you don’t Heath, no you don’t. When Troy Brown stole the ball and it was over, all over, was there any doubt that Tom Brady was taking the Patriots to the Promised Land? Mister, he ain’t a boy, no, he’s a man. And he believes in a Promised Land.” Bruce Springsteen style. Was there? C’mon, you know there wasn’t. You knew. I knew. The Chargers knew. Most of all, Tom Brady knew. He knew those three picks meant nothing. He knew his 57.6 QB rating wasn’t the number that mattered. Just like he knows the Pro Bowl isn’t the Bowl that matters. Tom Brady knew what he was going to do. How couldn’t he? He’s done it before. And before that and before that. He’s pulled a Jack Bauer and came back in the fourth quarter 24 times in the regular season. He’s done it six times in the post season. He did it again Sunday. You saw it. You knew there was going to be no OT. Throws the perfect strike to Crazy Eyes Caldwell. Ball game. Go Go Gostowski for three. Go Go Gostkowski becomes the first rookie to kick a game-winning field goal in the playoffs since the 1970 season. Adam who? Tom Brady continues his legend. Right now, he is the best football player in the world. You cannot convince me otherwise. I’m picking a football team today, I’m picking Tom Brady. I’ll give you the next three picks. When all is said and done, when you’re playing trot trot to Boston, trot trot to Lynn with your grandkids, you’ll be telling them how you saw the greatest football player who ever lived. You’ll tell them you saw Tom Brady. Roll Pats, roll!

One more thing. I keep hearing how the Colts are the Detroit Pistons. Biding their time for the right moment to beat the powerhouse Celtics and get to the NBA Finals. I’m not biting. First of all, know this: McHale doesn’t get hurt, there are no Detroit Pistons. Secondly, I think Peyton Manning and the Indianapolis Colts are more like Dominique and the Atlanta Hawks. Peyton, the Human Highlight Reel. Making all those highlights. Chasing his pleasures here. Digging his treasures there. But never breaking on through to the other side. Jim Morrison style.

Peace out homies. Six Two and Even! josh q. public

Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1048 days ago
Score -1+-
Just remember that you said "Adam Who?"...
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1048 days ago
Score -1+-
Maybe the article should be titled "Just barely Win"
Permalink
Anonymous Fanatic #1
1048 days ago
Score 1+-
its good to see people actually read these things. yes i did. Go Go Gostowski. Make sure you spell it right.
Permalink
XinophDraft Pick
1048 days ago
Score 0+-
Maybe your nickname should be "Whiny" Stiles.
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1048 days ago
Score 0+-
maybe your name should be "Collect Call from the Pot"???
Permalink
JuTMSY4Legend
1048 days ago
Score 0+-
and this is why i hope New England goes back into sports Purgatory...
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1048 days ago
Score -2+-
Don't you just miss the late 80s- early 90s???
Permalink
Josh Q. PublicVarsity
1048 days ago
Score -2+-
ya, philly has always been the pinacle of sportsmanship
Permalink
JuTMSY4Legend
1048 days ago
Score 0+-
Clearly New England is...ask LT
Permalink
JuTMSY4Legend
1048 days ago
Score 2+-
Which reminds me, what did my comment have to do with sportsmanship. I don't care that you guys win or lose (unless youre playing me team). But you guys are very arrogant and smug, and that is why I think you need a little piece of humble pie...
Permalink
Josh Q. PublicVarsity
1048 days ago
Score -2+-
oh my B. I am arrogant and I am smug. I'll admit that. But you have to admit that Tom Brady is one scary summamabitch in the post season.
Permalink
JuTMSY4Legend
1048 days ago
Score 0+-
I don't have to admit anything, you wrote the article
Permalink
Josh Q. PublicVarsity
1048 days ago
Score -1+-
ohhhh, i get it now. i forgot. i forgot why you are bitter. sorry. you saw it first hand. your guy wasn't clutch. now i remember.
Permalink
JuTMSY4Legend
1048 days ago
Score 0+-
Karma baby, karma...
Permalink
XinophDraft Pick
1048 days ago
Score -2+-
Aaawwww, someone's still bitter 'cause the Eagles lost.
Permalink
XinophDraft Pick
1048 days ago
Score -2+-
JuTMSY4, don't try to get all philosophical on us. You hate the Pats because they beat the Eagles, it's that simple. Ever think of blaming your coach or your quarterback instead of the other team, or just whining about it forever?
Permalink
JuTMSY4Legend
1047 days ago
Score 0+-
If you knew anything whatsover, you'd realize that all Philly does is blame the QB and the Coach. Now, if you'd actually read one god damn thing I wrote you'd realize the reason I hate New England Sports is because I live there and I witness first hand how dumb the fans can be (generalization, I admit, but there are a lot). When things get bad, you guys actually drink the kool-aid...

Am I bitter the Eagles lost? I would call it disapointment, but I was happy to have a good season.

Seriously, go write another article about how great the pats or celtics (wait, they're not...) are or something
Permalink
Anonymous Fanatic #2
1047 days ago
Score 0+-
i didn't realize you wrote one damn good thing. my mistake
Permalink
Josh Q. PublicVarsity
1048 days ago
Score -1+-
Manny, I didn't. That's why I'm doing this now. It's fun to be the king.
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1048 days ago
Score -1+-
Talk now speak later...
Permalink
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This page was last modified 17:50, 16 January 2007. Content is available under the GFDL.

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