If I Interviewed......Roger Goodell
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by SSreporters
From Stupid Sideline Reporters:
YES!! It's finally back! The series in which I interview some of the biggest names in American sports, and get some of the strangest feedback.
Disclaimer: It purely fictitious PEOPLE!
SSR is for me, RG is for Roger Goodell, commissioner of the NFL.
SSR: Nice to meet you Mr. Goodell.
RG: No problem.
SSR: How are you handling all of these duties in just your 2nd year as head honcho of the NFL?
RG: Well, it's pretty tough to work in this joint. Everyone is snapping at each other, some of the people I work with are total dogs. This is much tougher than I thought it would be. But, I'm fine as long as there is money in the bank.
SSR: Have you considered a vacation?
RG: Yes, I consider the fact that I do need a rest.
(awkward pause)
SSR: Do you plan to come up with new gimmicks to improve the image of the league?
RG: As a matter of fact I am, I plan to start a prison league in 2011.
SSR: Why do you say that?
RG: Because many of the players will be in jail by then. The Bengals vs. The other 31 teams that have problem players
SSR: That's absurd, I'm sure there aren't that many football players who are behaving badly.
RG: No, it's reality.
(I take a 2 minute break seeing that this is going nowhere)
SSR: What do you think of Bill Belichick?
RG: I think he's a great coach who just has some problems, you know, um...
SSR: Playing by the rules?
RG: No, smiling.
SSR: Let's move away from football, what are your favorite TV shows?
RG: Arrested Development, Prison Break, anything that's on CourtTV.
SSR: Never mind, dumb question.
RG: You want dumb, look at Rex Grossman's passes.
SSR: THAT IS IT!! Interview over. All you are doing is criticizing these players, and it's bugging me, so good day to you sir.
So there you have it, If I interviewed Roger Goodell is complete. Check in next time when I interview Dick Vermeil.
