Ichiro Stays with Mariners, Still Object of Cleveland Fans' Fists
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So Ichiro is a big name that will be taken off the list as a potential free agent at the end of this season. Suzuki is signing a 5-year, $100 million extension with the Seattle Mariners, a move that was likely fueled and completed quickly because of the team’s great play as of late. Isn’t that just dandy for Ichiro? He gets to make over 100 million dollars and he does not have to punch himself in the face over it!
Personally, I would give my left foot to watch the Mariners lose 100 games for the next five years. The Japanese star, who has been in Major League Baseball ever since 2001 when he stole the Rookie of the Year award from C.C. Sabathia, will be making somewhere around $20 million a year and that is a hard salary to move in a trade. Therefore, there would bring me no greater pleasure than to watch the Mariners tank deeper and deeper into the bottom of the American League West every year.
Ever since that miserable little man made a derogatory comment about Cleveland, I have had a personal vendetta against him that just won’t go away.
Speaking through an interpreter about the idea of making up a snowed-out game in Cleveland, he said: “To tell the truth, I’m not excited to go to Cleveland, but we have to.”
Okay, that’s fine. He could have just left the comment at that. Instead, he added this delightful little quip: “If I ever saw myself saying I’m excited going to Cleveland, I’d punch myself in the face, because I’m lying.”
Funny guy, that Ichiro. Cleveland has never been known as being the best city in the world; heck, rarely has it been a city people could be proud of. One of the few things people have to cherish in this city are the sports teams. Make fun of the city’s mayor and horrific city planning that takes place all you want. Say something bad about the teams of this town and you are gonna have problems.
Am I going to say that I would laugh if I heard that someone actually did punch him in the face the next time he came to Cleveland? No, because that would be wrong (but here’s a secret – it would be the funniest thing that would ever happen in my life and I would probably never stop laughing about it). If there was a video online of the aforementioned assault on Ichiro’s face, would I find it and replay it over and over and over again at the point of impact, showcasing agony and pain as his expression for an endless amount of time? Of course not (yes I would).
And now he wins MVP of the All-Star Game. How very fitting for him and his dandy little inside-the-park home run. I can only hope that when he visits Cleveland again, the fans give him a nice, warm welcome that he will never forget. I am not condoning threats or any physical confrontations, but I have never been opposed to some good, old-fashioned heckling that could bring a man to tears.
On second thought, let’s hope the Mariners make the playoffs and the Indians are matched up with them at some point. Then the real fun will begin.
