I Just Don't Get It: Small Athlete, Big Mouth
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by Suckatsports
I just don’t get it.
By now everyone has heard Starbury’s response to the Vick situation. Prime time had similar thoughts …. Just ridiculous.
You may expect me to question how Starbury could be so stupid to say that. But I am not shocked. Starbury’s been living by different rules than the rest of us all his life. How could we possibly expect him to understand how any rational person would feel?
But what I just don’t get is: Doesn't Starbury have representation? An agent who he pays a portion of his contract? Someone with an IQ above 37 who he trusts?
And if he does, WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY?!? Shouldn't someone take him aside and quietly say: “Hey Starbury, listen, I know you’re great and all, and your shitty shoes are selling like hotcakes over at Steve and Barry’s, but uh, SHUT THE FUCK UP!”
Seriously, why is he opening his mouth? All he had to do was say “no comment” or just say what we want to hear.
The same agent should remind Marbury about the endorsement money that comes from the pockets of companies who are trying to court the average American, namely those who hate dog fighting and don’t compare it to hunting.
Hell, Marbury, since your agent team seems to be a little late (considering you DID “clarify” your comments) let me introduce Exhibit A in the plaintiff's case of Not saying stupid shit so that the public turns against you v. “keeping it real” and saying whatever you feel.
Exhibit A: Latrell freaking Sprewell
He’s a lot like you Starbury. Fast, overrated, a little over the hill and apparently fucking crazy.
Do you want to lose your yacht Star? Do you!
You run fast, can bounce a ball real good and sometimes can put it through a little hoop. Personally I love it. But you make your money as an entertainer. Joe Public doesn't want to spend money on people who kill dogs, nor does he want to spend money on people who support those who kill dogs.
But lets not assume Starbury is the only guy who opens his mouth when he probably should stick to his main skill. The aforementioned Prime Time is another example. Emmitt Smith probably feels pretty stupid for his early comments too.
But thankfully I have a solution for all the athletes, or team owners who let it slip that they planned to move a team all along (see, owners do dumb shit too), who apparently cannot figure out when to shut their mouths. HIRE ME! In a year I’ll be a law school grad, unless I get kicked out, and I even have a degree in journalism so I can tell you what the press is gonna do with your crazy statements.
I think this could work out for everyone. Call me!
I just don't get it!
I Just Don’t Get It is a weekly-ish commentary of baffling issues in sports. Comments, Questions, and Job Offers (I’m talking to you Sheff) should be sent to detroitsportscity at gmail.com
Marbury: Michael Vick is '100 percent wrong' [New York Post] Marbury on dogfighting as a sport [The Knix Fix] Deion Sanders protects Vick [Newspress] Spree's Yacht Yanked [New York Post] '
Like what you read? This post is cross-published from We Suck at Sports.
