I Can Stop Anytime
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by Ron Sen, MD
Optional. No big deal. I don't need this. I can stop watching anytime. Who really cares that a directional school (Northwest Missouri State) is beating Valdosta State 20-19 with four minutes left in the game? Not me, it's just background noise.
How many times have you watched your favorite team do something beyond the pale and said, "I'm never going to watch them again?" Me neither.
Tony Kornheiser wrote a pretty good book, Bald as I Wanne Be, and he's not bad on the PTI, but why is he on Monday Night Football? Not that I'm watching that either. And some people can't stand John Madden, Joe Buck, Tim McCarver, or Joe Morgan. How would I know? Don't have to listen to 'em.
Nothing really counts about the NBA season, and often about the first 46 minutes of a regular season game, but who would be watching that, especially the Boston Celtics, who aren't boring for the first time in maybe fifteen years? Or worse, watch the expanded post-game show with highlights and interviews with players and Doc Rivers?
Hockey, are you kidding me?
Is World Series of Poker a sport? About as much as Scrabble...should we be embarrassed if we know Phil, Jesus, or can we name any of these guys and gals?
If there weren't sports, would there have been a need for High Definition TV? Who needs Bobby Knight, Coach K, Pitino, or the Final Four.
Tiger Woods hadn't played a tournament for over a couple of months. No, I would only be hoping to get some tips on how to improve my lawn care...if I actually watched. No, I don't need local high school sports coverage on the Cable Channel, ESPN online, especially ESPN Insider, and ESPN the magazine. I don't need Bill Simmons, Peter Gammons, Buster Olney, Chris Mortensen, or perfect-haired Mel Kiper. Nope, don't read 'em.
I certainly don't need the Icky Shuffle, Dirty Bird, Fun Bunch, T.O., or Sack Dance.
And I don't need to do the play-by-play for the local high school volleyball team broadcasts, or maintain blogs for local sports teams, or write for Boston Dirt Dogs.
I don't need sports coverage, sports media, or sports online, especially the Sagarin Ratings. I can stop anytime. You can, too. Is there any ping pong on today? If there isn't I might have to watch Kingpin again.
