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Friday Fryer (June 22, 2007)

10
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by user Christof

A look at the sports week's biggest losers…
by Christof



Welcome to the first 2007 summer edition of the Friday Fryer, where we take a look at who was the sports world's biggest idiot this week. This article is so hot that it broke the water main up the block from where I live! So without any additional delay, let’s go take a look at our three finalists and, of course, the person or team who is being dipped into the Fryer....

THE FINALISTS
The San Francisco Giants
The 2007 MLB season for the Giants will be remembered mostly for what Barry Bonds does. It is more than likely that Bonds will set the all-time career home run mark this year. Normally, this would be a tremendous occasion, one that all Giants’ fans would be proud of. Unfortunately, Bonds has that giant dark cloud called steroids hanging over his head. This storm is simply putting a damper on any positive feeling one may get from watching Bonds break the record.

What makes matters worse is the rest of the Giants. The club now sits with a record of 30 wins and 41 losses. Currently, the Giants are on a seven game slide. Now, only the Washington Nationals and Cincinnati Reds have worse records in the National League.

It is time for the Giants to blow the whole thing up and start from scratch. Assuming that Bonds sets the home run record, this should be his last season. Even if he does not retire, the Giants need to move on. Should they fail to do so, this Friday Fryer nomination will become the norm for the club.

 
Jason Schmidt
Schmidt was considered one of the best starting pitchers to hit free agency last winter. Personally, I thought Schmidt was too much of a risk. Yes, he had a strong year in 2006, however, 2006 was his contract year. The previous year, he struggled. In addition, Schmidt had a history of arm trouble.

Even though I thought Schmidt was too much of a risk, real baseball men did not. The winner of the Schmidt bidding war was none other than the Los Angeles Dodgers. With the Dodgers battling for first place in the tough NL West, it seemed as though the baseball men were right. That was, until this week.

Now, Schmidt is on the disabled list, done for the season. This week, Schmidt went under the knife to repair his injured pitching shoulder. The rehab required for this is expected to be significant, yet Schmidt is expected back for the 2008 season.

Nonetheless, the amount spent on Schmidt and his injury has left the Dodgers in a bind. This may very well cost them a chance at a post-season berth. Thus, Jason Schmidt and his injured shoulder gets a Chair nomination for this week.

 
Pacman Jones
This clown simply does not get it. You would think that being questioned over ten times by the police over the past two years would wake him up. Nope. How about a full year suspension from the NFL for his actions off of the field? Nope. How about being charged with a couple of felonies stemming from a shootout at a Las Vegas strip club during the NBA’s All-star weekend? Again, no!

This week, Pacman may have been involved in another shooting incident, and police are asking to speak to him in regards to those events. Pacman, however, is claiming that he is too busy to talk to the police. Since he is only permitted to practice one a week at the Tennessee Titans facility, what else could he be doing? Let me guess, something not legit!

Pacman more than likely has played in his last NFL game. The question now is whether Pacman days on this planet are winding down. Lets face it, Pacman is on a path that will end violently. It is like watching a train wreck in slow motion. Hence, Pacman Jones gets a Friday Fryer Chair nomination this week.

AND THE LOSER IS . . .
LaVar Arrington
Lavar earns the Friday Fryer Chair for an act that nearly got him a pine box. On this past Monday, Lavar, a novice motorcycle rider, wrecked his bike. As a result, Lavar sustained several broken bones, including a broken arm and leg. With training camp only a month away, it sure does appear that LaVar will be sitting at home for the entrire 2007 season.

This week, Lavar turned 29 years old. He was cut by the New York Giants a few months ago. This was because LaVar blew out his Achilles tendon last season. Throwing in the birthday gifts of a broken arm and leg, and LaVar’s body is simply to brittle for football.

This is truly sad, for Lavar had the physical assets to be one of the all-time great linebackers in NFL history. He even made it to three Pro-Bowls. Mentally, however, Lavar was never together. It seemed as though circuits in his brain simply did not connect properly. Evidence of this was first shown during his playing days at Penn State.

Anyway, the motorcycle accident and resulting injuries may have been the final nail in Lavar’s NFL career coffin. So much talent, yet so little to ultimately show for it. Therefore, Lavar Arrington gets the Friday Fryer Chair this week.

Until next Friday, AMF!




Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
889 days ago
Score 0+-
I will never forget how awe inspiring Lavar was at Penn State (the Lavar Leap). What a sad story for a guy that I WANTED to see do good (even if he was a Redskin and Giant)
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False ProphetAll-Star
888 days ago
Score 0+-
No Wolves mention? They get to ditch T-Hud and get talent and a top 5 pick for KG, but they forgot that KG wanted out because he wanted to WIN
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