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Friday Fryer (February 9, 2007)

16
Vote


by user Christof

a look at the sports week's biggest losers
by Christof


Welcome to the Friday Fryer, where we take a look at who was the sports' world's biggest idiot this week. Big snows are expected to slam the eastern part of the United States, but the Fryer is nice and hot right now. So without further ado, let's go take at our three finalists and, of course, the person or team being dipped into the Fryer....

THE FINALISTS
Snickers
What Snickers did with their Super Bowl commercial should be taught in all Marketing 101 in the world as what NOT TO DO. Not only do you do a commercial that was not funny, it insulted nearly everyone who saw it and will make the core consumer, kids here, unlikely to buy the candy bar.

First, I do not want to see two guys kissing and I was offended for having that image pop across the television screen. Second, others were insulted because after the two guys kissed, they both ripped out chest hair to show how manly they were. Third, Snickers and their marketing unit should realize what their core consumer group is – kids, between the ages of 6 and 18. Now, may I ask you, what will happen to little Johnnie the next time he breaks out a Snickers in a middle school lunch room? Well, little Johnnie is going to get ridicule to no end. So now not only was this commercial stupid, unfunny and insensitive, it will also brand destructive.

Folks, if you own stock in the Snickers company, SELL. Sell before the first quarter earnings come out in 2 months. If not, you are going to be personally paying for that horrible commercial. But at least the commercial got a Friday Fryer nomination, right?

 
Dallas Cowboys
May Jerry Jones live and own the Cowboys for another century. He was fortunate to hire Jimmy Johnson and rob the Minnesota Vikings in the Walker trade. Those two events led to three Super Bowls victories.

These three Super Bowls victories will likely be the last for the Cowboys for many years to come. This is mainly because it looks like Jerry Jones wants to be the backroom head coach of the Cowboys. That is the only plausible explanation as to why Jones hired Wade Phillips as the new Cowboys head coach, replacing the retired Bill Parcells.

Philips is a good defensive coordinator, but, as a head coach, he is over matched. Philips has never, and will never, win a playoff game. He is, however, a great yes man.

So, for the Dallas Cowboys fans who read this, I feel your pain. I do thank Jerry though, for his actions help the Eagles in their quest to dominant the NFC East for this decade. Help from anywhere is always appreciated. But hey, the Cowboys still have Terrell Owens to throw the ball to and have throw Philips under the bus as soon as possible.

This Friday Fryer nomination was too easy….

 
Duke University Blue Devils
What has happened to Coach K and his boys? Could it be that men’s basketball team from Duke University may be on the bubble to make the NCAA Tournament this year? After losing three straight games, two of them at home, it sure looks like Duke is in a world of hurt.

Duke’s overall record is okay at 18-6, however, they are only 5-5 in the ACC. In addition, one of those wins, against Clemson, was highly controversial because of an officiating mistake. The only good thing going for Duke currently is the fact that the season still has a month worth of games left to be played.

Right now, I would call Duke a bubble team. With their history, Duke will likely still get into the tournament. This may not be right, especially when there will be quite a few teams from mid-majors who had better seasons then Duke. Nonetheless, the Duke in-progress collapse gets them a nomination for this week’s Fryer.

AND THE LOSER IS . . .
Rex Grossman
Honestly, Rex deserved to be named MVP of Super Bowl XLI. He did more than any player to ensure that the Indianapolis Colts would the game. Now, if only Rex was a Colt and not a member of the Chicago Bears.

The great Grossman fumbled a snap in the first half, and they threw two costly interceptions in the fourth quarter. The first pick was with the Colts ahead by only 5 points. Sadly, after this pick, the Colts lead went to double digits. And that, my friends, was all she wrote for that game.

What is truly sad is that the Colts brought their C- game to the Super Bowl. They were the fourth seed in the AFC. Yet, they were still able to handle the Bears, who were the one seed from the NFC. My oh my, how the NFC has fallen. Actually, the level of play in the NFL is at an all-time low. At least we do not watch the slop again until September.

So instead of Super Bowl MVP, Rex Grossman gets the Friday Fryer Chair award this week. Congratulations!



Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1023 days ago
Score 3+-
yeah! it's Friday!!!

Snickers is owned by Mars Inc., a private, family-owned company, so good luck selling a stock that doesn't exist. Besides WHY sell if they theoretically just screwed up? Too late! If the price dropped buy more!

The mistake they made was taking the commercial DOWN. They caved to ridiculous pressure mostly from homophobes complaining about the "outtakes" on their website, instead of sticking to their guns. Although, I agree the commercial was pretty stupid.

Wade Phillips is keeping the seat warm for future coach Garrett. (Good luck getting to T.O. Wade... I'm sure he'll respect you more than Parcells)

The key to advertising is to get people to talk about it. No publicity is bad publicity. Two guys sharing a candy bar in a commercial doesn't change the product. I'm sure there's people out there doing WAAAAY worse things with Snickers bars.
Permalink | Reply
Alex HolowczakHall of Famer
1023 days ago
Score 1+-
The same Mars inc. that makes Mars bars. Scotland likes battered mars bars! Isn't it amazing how two completely different conversations have come to the same point!
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1023 days ago
Score 0+-
The same Mars Inc. that makes M&M's
Permalink
False ProphetAll-Star
1023 days ago
Score 0+-
Mmmmmmmmm...M&Ms
Permalink
Kermie and palPee Wee
1023 days ago
Score 2+-
wade phillips is still allowed to work in the NFL?? and he's replacing Bill Parcells?? that's kinda like dusty rhodes when he made his move from Baby Doll to Sapphire... *ugh*
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1023 days ago
Score 0+-
hey, Dusty Rhodes was a hell of a third baseman!
Permalink
KelsdadAll-Star
1023 days ago
Score 1+-
Dusty Rhodes played 497 ML games, all as an outfielder.
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1023 days ago
Score 0+-
that's what I said! Hell of an outfielder, that Dusty Rhodes!
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1023 days ago
Score 0+-
(I was thinking 3rd base line, yeah... that's the ticket!)
Permalink
JB82Div-I Stud
1021 days ago
Score 0+-
Great to see this again!
Permalink | Reply
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