Friday Fryer (August 18, 2006)

TGIF! But before we flee for the fun of the weekend, we need to take care of some business. We need to see who gets the Chair in the Friday Fryer.

The first finalist this week is one Terrell Owens. Mr. T.O. seems to have a bruised hammy although the MRI he took showed no damage. Hence, he missed roughly a week of practice. But never fear, Mr. T.O. made sure the spot light was on him during his down time. It is never good to hear T.O. quote Allen Iverson in regards to practice. To the Dallas Cowboys fans out there reading this, that train wreck that is T.O. is going to ruin your 2006 NFL season. Adjust your expectations accordingly.

Next finalist is Minnesota Vikings wide receiver Koren Robinson. Mr. Robinson is the latest player to be arrested, in the Year of the Arrested Player. It is alleged that Robinson took the local police on a high speed chase while under the influence. Even better, Robinson is already on probation for DUI in the State of Washington. Don’t worry, the sisters in his prison will teach him a new meaning for the term “wide receiver” soon enough.

And now the winner: A New York Mets Fan from Scranton, Pennsylvania. This bozo is a big David Wright, which is fine. This guy wanted to see Wright win the Home-Run Derby last month at the All-Star game, which is also cool. What is NOT cool is deciding that Wright was suppose to win no matter what. Hence, this Mets’ fan who needs metal help, decides to write Ryan Howard, the Home-Run Derby winner a letter. In it, he threatens Howard – that he is going to shoot him and put him in a wheelchair. For that, you get the Chair in the Friday Fryer and hopefully a few months in a mental institution.

Until next week, AMF!