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Friday Fryer (August 10, 2007)

20
Vote

by Christof

A look at the sports week's biggest losers…
by Christof



Welcome to the hottest edition of the Friday Fryer, where we take a look at who was the sports world's biggest idiot this week. This week was the hottest week of the year in most of the United States. The financial markets are in disarray. All of this just means that the Friday Fryer is boiling over. So without further ado, let’s go take a look at our three finalists and, of course, the person or team who is being dipped into the Fryer....

THE FINALISTS
Neifi Perez
The Detroit Tigers lost a player this past week for the rest of the season. This loss was not due to injury but illegal drug use. Surprisingly, Neifi was busted not for steroids, but for stimulants. This was Neifi’s second suspension this season.

This latest suspension is for 80 games. Do you think Neifi has learned his lesson? Raise your hand if you do….I thought so.

The true sadness of all of this is that Neifi is not the only one on stimulates in the majors. He is just dumb enough to get caught. But being stupid does have some perks, such as being nominated for the Friday Fryer Chair.

 
Kenny Irons
The second round pick for the Cincinnati Bengals from this year’s NFL Draft blew out his ACL in his first pre-season game. He is now lost for the season. Just like Ki-Jana Carter over a decade ago, Irons’ career may never be what it could have been.

Speaking of irony, both Irons and Carter blew out their ACL’s in pre-season games against the Detroit Lions. You would think that this will be the last time the Bengals set up a pre-season game against the Lions.

Football is a violent, violent sport. Serious injuries occur in almost every game. This brings up the question of why are there four pre-season games? Do teams really need four pre-season games to get ready for the season. This is especially true when the starters only play about 6-8 quarters in the entrie pre-season.

Lets face it, the time has come to cut down on the number of pre-season games. This won’t help Kenny Irons, but he may help another player down the road.

 
Mitch Cozad
Cozad was the back-up punter for Northern Colorado last season. He wished to become the starter. Hence, he stabbed the starting punter in his kicking leg with a five inch knife.

This week, Cozad was convicted of second degree assault. He now faces up to sixteen years in prison. At 22, this means that Cozad will be out of prison before he is forty. Not too shabby, eh?

Wait, let me get this straight. You are a back-up punter on a second tier college football team, and you decide that the only way to move up the depth chart is to stab the starter. What is this world coming to? Forget about working hard. Lets just off the guy in front of us.

Ugg. I watch pro sports for fun. I don’t need to see the same things that happen in everyday life occur in sports. When it does, it is almost an automatic Friday Fryer Chair. Luckily for Cozad, there is someone who is worthier of the Chair this week.

AND THE LOSER IS . . .
Barry Bonds
Bonds finally broke Hank Aaron’s all-time career home run record this week. Bonds currently has 757 home runs for his career. Although he cannot still play the field nor run, Bonds is still out there playing.

Bonds has been under a cloud of suspicion for years now. This is mainly due to the fact that at age 36, his yearly home run totals drastically shot up. Looking over the history of baseball, no other player saw their home run totals shoot up drastically after they turned 36. Rather, players tended to show a drastic decrease in the number of home runs they hit.

Nonetheless, Bonds has set the home run mark. When Bonds grand jury testimony, which has been leaked in parts, fully becomes available, this dark cloud will likely burst into a giant rain storm. More than likely, this will occur right before Bonds becomes eligible for the Hall of Fame.

Bonds could have taken the high road, and retired after he hit home run number 754 or 755 for his career. By doing so, Bonds could have shifted public opinion on his side. Instead, he continued on. When all of the facts of this era are known, Bonds will forever be harmed by it. What a shame. Bonds was a Hall of Fame player without doing anything illegal. However, because of jealously and ego, Bonds went to the dark side. History will have a final say on Bonds’ career. This history will include this week’s Friday Fryer Chair.

Until next Friday, AMF!




Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
JuTMSY4Legend
825 days ago
Score 1+-
Too easy Chris...too easy
Permalink | Reply
HappyskinnyAll-American
825 days ago
Score 0+-
Cozad is also probably going to face a civil suit so it doesn't look like it's going to get any better for him.
Permalink | Reply
InsanMajor Leaguer
825 days ago
Score 1+-
You get an lolcat for the Mitch Cozad piece. But where is JaMarcus Russell? He STILL hasn't signed with the Raiders...
Permalink | Reply
MegECass110AAA-er
825 days ago
Score 1+-
This week is a pretty historic week...Bonds, Cozad, or even Rory Sabbatini could have won.
Permalink | Reply
InsanMajor Leaguer
825 days ago
Score 0+-
Ahh yes, the Sergio Garcia wannabe that talks too much without ever having won a major...
Permalink
MegECass110AAA-er
825 days ago
Score 2+-
Sergio and Rory need to have a beer together and just talk shit about other golfers. That'd be a good reality show.
Permalink
Yakob878MVP
825 days ago
Score -1+-
ya won no contest bonds cheating to get the record you have done it again great job
Permalink | Reply
Alex HolowczakHall of Famer
825 days ago
Score 0+-
I'm surprised my nomination didn't get a mention!
Permalink | Reply
InsanMajor Leaguer
825 days ago
Score 0+-
Who's that?
Permalink
Alex HolowczakHall of Famer
825 days ago
Score 1+-
To quote from Christof's talk page (back when it was still relevant!)

"I would like to nominate Steve Rider and Damon Hill. On the ITV coverage of this weekend's Hungarian Grand Prix, there was a feature about Adrian Sutil, one of the drivers, who is a concert pianist. Within the space of 5 minutes, Rider (the presenter) and Hill (filling in as cover commentator) both mentioned the same fateful link. They said how F1 has a history of producing great pianists. They both cited Francois Cevert and Elio de Angelis as examples of this, so they suggested Sutil could go on to be like them. Both were decent drivers, both won Grand Prix and were both very reputable drivers. However, both have left more of a legacy for the wrong reasons. Both were killed at the wheel of a Formula One car, Cevert in 1973 at Watkins Glen, and de Angelis in testing at Le Castellet in 1986. So for the silliness of Rider and Hill, for hinting that a driver can follow in the same vein as drivers killed at the wheel of F1 cars, both within five minutes of each other, I nominate both Steve Rider and Damon Hill for the 'Chair."

That annoyed me, this week, although it wasn't perhaps obvious to the casual fan.
Permalink
ChristofMVP
825 days ago
Score 0+-
Sorry Alex, Ole' Mitchie bumped your nomination. Thanks though. Also, to all, I do accept nominations for the Cahir each and every week. SO if you have one, let me know.
Permalink
Yakob878MVP
825 days ago
Score -1+-
what was your nomination
Permalink | Reply
Ea34Div-I Stud
825 days ago
Score 0+-
I was really hoping Bonds would pull the retire with 754 HR move.
Permalink | Reply
Ea34Div-I Stud
825 days ago
Score 0+-
How does the idiot punter not win the award this week?
Permalink | Reply
CoreyisarealboyMajor Leaguer
825 days ago
Score 2+-
Or, if Christof absolutely has his heart set on Bonds' mention in the "winner" of the Friday Fryer, why not make it "fans of baseball"?
Permalink
KelsdadAll-Star
825 days ago
Score 0+-
Interesting little tidbit floating around. Hank Aaron initially refused to do the video which was played on the scoreboard after Bonds' HR, until Giants ownership pulled out their checkbook. They presented Aaron with a script to read, "Barry's great, record is legit, blah, blah, which Aaron completely ignored, he just ad-libbed his comment when the camera went on. Right on, Hank.
#44 This user is a fan of Hank Aaron the TRUE Homerun King.
Permalink | Reply
RomiezzoLegend
825 days ago
Score 0+-
Good work Christof. I knew Bonds and perez were going to be in there somewhere...
Permalink | Reply
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This page was last modified 19:23, 10 August 2007. Content is available under the GFDL.

Categories: Hank Aaron fans | Player Fan Tags | Opinions | Opinions by User Christof | Friday Fryer Opinions | Neifi Perez Opinions | NFL Opinions | AFC Opinions | Cincinnati Bengals | Detroit Tigers Opinions | Baseball Opinions | American League Opinions | Steroid Users Opinions | Football Opinions | College Football Opinions | Barry Bonds Opinions | National League Opinions | Mitch Cozad Opinions | San Francisco Giants Opinions | August 10, 2007

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