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File This Under Disgusting...

16
Vote

by JasonO

As a diehard football fan, have you ever wondered what the sweat of your favorite player tastes like? Perhaps you've been dying to sample some of that sports cream they rub on themselves after a long hard day on the field? Well get your taste buds ready, Jones Soda Co. of Seattle has answered your prayers. The company is now (seriously) taking pre-orders for a new line of soda flavors that "reflect the hard work of professional football players." Each bottle will have a photo of a Seattle Seahawk.

The lineup includes names like Dirt, Sports Cream, and Perspiration among others. Company spokeswoman Clare Bowles commented "Perspiration Soda is kind of salty tasting, with a stinky football sock finish."

Okay, it's not April 1st, and this information comes from the Associated Press not the Onion. What gives? I would go on record saying this is the worst business decision ever, but on the other hand had it not been for this I probably would have gone my whole life having never heard of Jones Soda Co.. This certainly has gotten them some publicity, but hopefully for their sake they don't make too many bottles of this stuff.



(a brief note about the author JasonO: JasonO is Jason Opdyke, an avid football fan, a less-than-avid writer, and founder of and contributing developer to SearchQB.com, THE football search engine.)


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TylersaltAll-Star
793 days ago
Score 0+-
eew.
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Yakob878MVP
792 days ago
Score 0+-
ya its pretty gross
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Tyrone BriggsHall of Famer
793 days ago
Score 3+-
Might be a good idea not to pickup a case of "Diet Shockey" next time at the grocery store.
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RawbeezeitzMajor Leaguer
793 days ago
Score 2+-
Two gross proposals for new flavors with disgusting fluids:

Mike Vick's new brand called "Failed Test"

Tom Brady's "Progeny Mix"

Apologies all around.
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JasonOWaterboy
793 days ago
Score 0+-
You wrote "Mike Vick's new brand called "Failed Test" Lol, that's priceless!
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WrmjrRed-Shirting
792 days ago
Score 0+-
I'd prefer that to Ron Mexico's Guava Punch.
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TrizzAll-American
792 days ago
Score 2+-
ill take Peyton Manning...he sweats Gatorade lol
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RawbeezeitzMajor Leaguer
792 days ago
Score 0+-
I wouldn't be surprised if Peyton winds up endorsing this product. He does ads for every other company in the world.
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AfraidofedhochuliDraft Pick
792 days ago
Score 1+-
I like this. If you know of Jones Soda, they do nutty things like this.

They have a pack for thanksgiving,this pack contained five new seasonal flavors which included: Green Bean Casserole Soda, Mashed Potato & Butter Soda, Fruitcake Soda, Cranberry Soda and Turkey & Gravy Soda

I never tried them, but i think it is cool that they go out on a limb and try to make things differnt
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JasonOWaterboy
792 days ago
Score 1+-
I had not heard of them before, but ideas like this make for great PR stunts. A good thing they aren't in the bakery business though, PR aside I think locker room "urinal cakes" would be a big flop!
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RawbeezeitzMajor Leaguer
792 days ago
Score 0+-
You Pacific Northwesterners are weird
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AfraidofedhochuliDraft Pick
792 days ago
Score 0+-
Yes...yes we are
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Boski93JV Squad
792 days ago
Score 0+-
That is worse than the rotten meat colored uniforms of the Seahawks. Not a bad team, but a bad idea(s).
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DonatevoMajor Leaguer
792 days ago
Score 0+-
Excuse me while I go barf.
Permalink | Reply
TrizzAll-American
792 days ago
Score 0+-
word on the streets Shaun Alexander flavor has added sugars...lmao
Permalink | Reply
VozzonWaterboy
792 days ago
Score 1+-
Jones makes a bunch of gimmick sodas that are really gross. I bought this thing that had Sweet Potato, Turkey and Gravy, Split Pea, Antacid and another one that I can't remember. So this info is probably true.
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Falcon02520Legend
792 days ago
Score 0+-
I've heard of Jones Soda, but I would never have tried it, and now I deffinatly will never try it...
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TylersaltAll-Star
792 days ago
Score 0+-
Jones actually makes legitimate sodas as well. They make a black cherry and a root beer which are both very good.
Permalink | Reply
Silencer76AAA-er
792 days ago
Score 0+-
Jones is the company that broke the Coke and Pepsi stranglehold on the NFL when they landed the contract at Qwest Field. The green apple is not too bad either...but I am partial to black cherry over most other soda flavors. They are known for using pure can e sugar in their stuff as opposed to other miscellaneous crap.
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WfrazerjrSoccer Kid
792 days ago
Score 1+-
Jones Soda is some damned fine stuff. I recommend it highly. Michael Irvin won't be switching, however, as we know he's hooked on Coke. I was surprised to see Jason Sehorn drinking a bottle of Jones Soda on the NFL Network set, however, as I'd always heard he preferred it in the can.
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