Fake News About the San Francisco Giants
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by SSreporters
Good evening. I'd like to give a shot at the San Francisco Giants, in a fake news kind of way. Don't write to me, I warned you already.
Barry Bonds to Be Cloned to Play Every Position For Remainder of the Season
(San Francisco Chronicle)-----
In a startling turn of events, San Francisco Giants manager Bruce Bochy has decided that they will have Barry Bonds start every position for the rest of the year, and will be cloned before their game against the Milwaukee Brewers. Bochy stated that "It was a risky choice, but because he is chasing history, and the team is incompetent, why not do it?". Barry and Balco are extremely happy with this decision, as Bonds is now 3 homers away from the All-Time Home Run record. This may be a sign that the Giants have given up, but from the looks of things, they pretty gave up after game 1. His teammates however, are quite angry at Bochy's decision. "Yeah, we suck, but we shouldn't take a vacation just because we aren't Barry Bonds.", said Barry Cantpitch, who has struggled most of the year. We won't know if the cloning process will help the Giants make .500 by the end of the year, but Bochy will try anything.
