College Football Road Trip

by user LastRow

Can you smell what’s coming? The mixture of scents flowing through the air…Means only one thing. The lawnmowers are out in preparation maintaining patches of grass equaling 120 yards length, schools are beginning to get back in the swing of things with the return of students hoping to further enhance their knowledge with the institutions sucking all the financial life out of them. So much in fact their great grandkids will end up finishing paying off granddad’s college experience…So much for Gramps willing anything.

While there’s certain more college towns to visit than this in the coming fall…The following locations are definitely a must! Who cares if you love the teams below, or rather rake your fingers down a chalkboard, it’s not about the team, it’s about the entire weekend experience. So if you & the fellas want to take a road trip this fall, LastRowSports.com has come up with a couple of must stops. From the Northeast, to the Midwest, Southwest, & West, we got you covered. If you happen to get lost along the way, just pull into a friendly looking gas station & ask for directions to the nearest big-time university…Only this time it’s a good thing to ask for directions.

MIDWEST – South Bend, IN

Get as Close to Brady Quinn as Possible – This year’s edition of Matt Leinart, Brady is definitely going to be attracting every piece of ass in town…Although, lets see. Los Angeles women or the women of South Bend, that’s a tough call? Get on board this bandwagon now, since Brady has a girlfriend…There’s nothing wrong with accepting denied applications. Got to fill vacancies somehow right? However, BQ’s girlfriend is in a different area code, so I don’t know what kind of guidelines & rules apply here?

NORTHEAST – Buffalo, NY

Anywhere in Buffalo Will Do – Just judging by the Buffalo Bulls, (yes, that’s really what they’re called…I’m not gay enough to make that up) a goose egg in the win column for the home portion of their schedule the past two seasons…You know what this means. They’re bound to break this home losing streak sometime, which means the town is going to erupt. Is there anything thing better & more attractive than co-eds just looking for a good reasons to become intoxicated? Be on hand for this boys…Oh yeah, don’t forget the Beer Goggles, because when Buffalo Wins, You Win. Go Bulls!

SOUTHEAST – Tallahassee, FL

The Local Bar Dive Scene – This is the opposite of the Buffalo scene, but holds the same concept. For the past decade the Florida State Seminoles have been virtually unbeatable at home…This is a very good thing. Always ranked as one of the best party schools in the country with the combination of winning and better looking co-eds than Buffalo from a preeminent ground, before, during, & best of all after a Seminoles victory. Yes, in Tallahassee they seem to have a thing for spears…Don’t leave home and come to Tally without yours.

SOUTHWEST – College Station, TX

Grandstand’s at Kyle Field – One of the best traditions in all of college football happens here. Nowhere else can one watch a football game & get a free-pass to making out with a girl at the same time (well, hopefully it’s a girl, otherwise somebody has some explaining to do). The mass makeout session occurs every time the home town Aggies score…When they score so do you. Foreplay in the stadium as a football game is unfolding…If this is what heaven’s about, God all about I’m all in…Just not yet. GO AGGIES, KEEP ON SCORING!

WEST – Bosie, ID

Yes Boise! The planet Pluto of College Football…For this is the only place where one will find a blue playing surface. Just that alone…Everybody should at least experience this at least once in their lives. No need to add drinks on the one. Now, here’s the fun part, to make the blue turf turn green, simply add your favorite alcoholic beverage(s). Although at this time LastRowSports.com is unclear about the amount of beverage intake that is needed for this to occur. So just try it out yourself, and be the guinea pig…”Chicks Dig Guinea Pigs.” Besides enduring the blue field, nowhere acrossed the country will one find better gray skies & corpse-white co-eds six weekends a season. Beauty at its finest…Just make sure you travel with buddy Jack, Jim, Sam, & Captain to potato land.

Others receiving votes: Any other school not mentioned in this list, because my fingers need to be put on three days rest. Just remember one thing peeps and this holds true for all schools around this great nation…WIN OR LOSE, EVERYBODY STILL WILL BOOZE! Boozing with co-eds before, during, and after the game…Well let’s just say there’s no greater pasttime than this fellas! What’s more gratifying than having twins showing up with COORS LIGHT in hand…Now this is certainly on the grounds of a new MAN LAW! Here’s to College Football! If one is ever in a college town looking for that 3 a.m. snack, well there’s only one place to go…Muffy’s Smorgasbord. A 24-hour, all you can eat buffet with all the trimmings. To find the closest Muffy’s Smorgasbord nearest to your favorite college town just simply dial 1-800-8-MUFFYS. Charges may apply in various instances & circumstances.

Since everybody's to lazy to cast the vote in the LastRowSports.com Pick'em Poll, I've decided to make it real easy for you couch potatos. Simply click this link or worse case copy & paste it (WHOAH, I might be asking for to much with with the pasting) www.LastRowSports.com There, real easy!

Date

Thu 08/24/06, 6:06 pm EST