Coaching Candidates to Take Over the Oakland Raiders
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by user LastRow
Given the utter disarray of the Oakland Raiders organization, ever since getting lambblasted by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in Super Bowl XXXVII, you can’t help it feel pity for Al Davis and company. Why here’s a storied franchise that has changed coaches over the past few years than I’ve changed my tidie whities…I know, it’s not a pleasant thought at all. We were told that bringing Art Shell back to Oak-Town for his second stint was just what the doctor ordered to resurrect things in the black hole…Turns out just after one year the sequel was no different than the original, just that the sequel was more like a half hour comedy rather than an hour long special.
Who will Al Davis & the Raiders hire next? That’s the question…Although my question is will it really matter? I wonder if this time Big Al will scurry up all the employees at the Howard Johnson hotel chains across this great nation to see if he can find a diamond in the rough…Because those Bed & Breakfasts, well, they’re just not working! Perhaps Al would take this opportunity to consult with Matt Millien to see who he suggests…Since it appears he has a good handle on things in Detroit.
Well Al, I don’t know you…Haven’t had the dubious distinction of meeting you, but I would like to help a senior citizen out here. I know you have a lot of things on your mind these days with your health deteriorating…We all understand that’s your number one worry, rightfully so! We all will be at that stage that you are now…Some sooner than later. As a football fan, I’ve compiled a list of coaching candidates that I feel as though they would make good successors to Art Shell. I’ve given you 50-plus names Al to look over, (yes, I did say 50-plus names) and just maybe, just maybe you’ll find one that stands out. All the names below come with extraordinary character that will uphold the Raider mystique…I’ll be honest, of the candidates below you won’t find any great character in individuals! Why, it’s second to none!
If there’s a name on here that stands out to you Al, just get in contact with LastRowSports.com…We have everybody’s contact information whose name appears below. Looking forward to speaking with you Mr. Al Davis.
Sincerely Your Friends @ LastRowSports.com Enclosure: Coaching Candidates List
1. Bugs Bunny 2. Homer Simpson 3. Rocky or Bullwinkle 4. Beavis or Butt-head 5. The Grinch 6. Fred or Barney 7. Angelica Pickles 8. Charlie Brown, (just make sure Lucy doesn’t come around) 9. SpongeBob 10. Cartman 11. Bart Simpson 12. Fat Albert 13. Garfield 14. Daffy Duck 15. Pikachu 16. Gumby 17. Betty Boop 18. Top Cat 19. Mickey Mouse 20. Popeye 21. Gerald McBoing-Boing 22. Scooby-Doo 23. Underdog 24. Josie of the Pussycats 25. Heckle or Jeckle 26. Arthur 27. Winnie the Pooh 28. Felix the Cat 29. Mr. Magoo 30. George of the Jungle 31. Ren and Stimpy 32. Tom Terrific 33. Tweety or Sylvester 34. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle(s) (Any of them…Splinter can be the GM) 35. Space Ghost 36. Yogi Bear or Boo Boo 37. Mighty Mouse 38. Wiley E. Coyote or Road Runner 39. Superman 40. Batman 41. Daria 42. Wonder Woman 43. Donald Duck 44. Alvin 45. Tasmanian Devil 46. Woody Woodpecker 47. Porky Pig 48. Bobby Hill 49. Speed Racer 50. Tom or Jerry
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