Cleveland Browns or Britney Spears…What’s Worse Watching?
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by LastRow
On one Sunday afternoon back in the day, man decides he needs to get away from his nagging ball-n-chain to enjoy himself. Instead of hopping in his "Pimp My Ride, Ragged Out Ford Pinto" to take a drive to clear his head, he instead opts to take a walk…Trying to help the beer belly. Upon him leaving the old battle ax wants to know when she should expect him home…He replies, "Whenever I get back"! And so the walking exhibition begins. Turns out the walk leads him down to his favorite watering hole…Oh yeah, let’s not forget he walked five miles in the snow without any shoes. Didn’t I say it was back in the day? Looking to enjoy the day with some friendly faces and try on as many different kinds of beer goggles as he can!
Upon his arrival, he enters the front doors of "Rehab", (the bar’s name) to learn several things. First off, they must’ve known he was coming…For they just tapped a brand new keg of Old Style. Aw yes, nothing like living in heaven…Being surrounded by your fellow drinkers, participating in as many beer pong games as the legs can support until you just fall off the bar stool flat on your face…Nothing like it, right? May I remind you this is still back in the day…Before the days of DirectTV. Meaning one NFL game on the local boob tube. This week’s game…None other than the Browns and Steelers. Or the NFL’s version of Huey - Duey – Louie. Although, that’s only on one boob tube…Lucky for him this establishment has another one. To his relief! On the boob viewer one can enjoy watching the one, the one Britney Spears and all her blubber shaking across the VMA stage…Roll it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihH6TpxPcRI
Now of course, both would make anyone drink heavily, although the important question is which one makes you consume more barley & hops? A very difficult question to answer sober…Although with the beer goggles, I’m down with some blubber…Even the double blubber!
It’s a given that the Cleveland Browns are bad, really bad…Although, worse than Spears? On Sunday we saw the beginning and the end of Charlie Fye’s stink in Cleveland all in the first half. It’s a given that Derek Anderson is keeping the seat warm until art thou the Romeo has no other choice but to put Mr. BBBQ Man in there and learn as he gets Snooped Up Side His Head time after time. When will that be? I say week four after the Browns get past these two other "Murderous Row" games…However, some say sooner and it’s hard to argue that! Clearly, Quinn is their best option…Although how quickly we forget as this same franchise found themselves in the same predicament back in 1999. Throwing Tim Couch to the wolves…Having him learn on the run, until he ran out of football, thus forcing him to stab and probe himself with HGH to try and resurrect his career. Not saying lightning would strike twice in Cleveland, but you can understand the cautiousness surrounding when he does play.
That fact of the matter is, he’s going to be forced in there sooner than the Browns would like anyway! Although, a similar situation arose in Nashville last season. The Titans hand was basically forced in playing Vince Young…Look at how that has turned out for them! Not too bad!
We all know Brady’s the future in Cleveland, but from the looks of it…The future is knocking on the front door as Huey & Duey’s performance yesterday was worse than ole Thunder Thighs, Flabby Abs, Double Chin herself! So for the sake of everybody who has to watch your games…Please, no more Badonka Donk Butt at the drive thru...Or in your case, behind center!
