BCWRECKS!
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by LastRow
The few things this college football season has taught us is, for one, don’t be ranked number one or especially number two. To expect the unexpected, because it will happen…Just ask all them couch burners in West Virginia. I call it "The curse of Major Harris"! Although the most important thing that we’ve learned over the past four months is a new way of counting! Now Kindergarten Cop taught me that boys have penis’s and girls have vaginas and really I can’t tell you how valuable that that information has been over the years, however, I just wish that Mr. Governor – Teacher did a better job of helping me learn how to count properly! Damn It Arnold…No wonder why I was never good in math! Because I was always under the assumption that counting from 1-10 simply went like this…1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10! At least that’s how Gloria Estefan and her sound machine did it! Until this past weekend I was still under the assumption of what I learned all throughout going to school…And then to learn that I’d been taught wrong, well, the best way I can put it is, I felt like a prostitute looking for her next suck trying to make a buck! I feel so used!
Speaking of which, I’m guessing that’s exactly how Mark Richt and his Bulldogs feel! They were in the drivers seat as Celeste hopped into the cab of the truck…Just one small problem. Mike the Tiger rode off with Celeste…And Mr. UGA was left, well, holding his bone shall we say. Look, I totally get why Georgia got Froggered by LSWHO…Conference Champs as opposed to not being District Champs or Division Champs, whatever the hillbillies call it! My problem solely lies in the fact that Georgia was ranked ahead of LSU for a reason! Why, just last week nobody seemed to give a shit…Now, all of a sudden, it’s like, "Oh, we done fu***** up…Georgia had no right being ranked third"! Two words come to mind…JAM JOB, 2007 has had their many fair shares of them! Them Dawgs fell from third to fifth without even playing…Although being dubbed by many "the best time in the country at this poit in time!"
This begs the question yet again, why do we have polls? Oh yes, to control the chaos if there was any, right? Gotcha! Um, so what would this be called? When the "BCS National Championship Game" should instead be dubbed "You can call it the National Championship if you want, but is it?" Are these two the two best teams in the nation? Um, most likely not! Why, I believe it’s more believable to believe Barry Bonds "never took or knowingly took steroids) than to think that these two are the nations best!
Does LSU deserve it…Well, the fact is that they are unbeaten in regulation! Gimme a break, and a one legged duck swims in a circle, Celeste sweats in church, Playboy Playmates are HOT, and George "Wiener Bush is still looking for "Weapons of Mass Destruction"! Or better yet, I got another fact for you, they are 0-2 in overtime…So if you’re listening Coach Sweater Vest, it would be in your best interest to see if your Buckeyes can get the game into overtime! Then, and only then would you seem to have a chance to beat a team from the SEC in a little game that matters!
This isn’t just a LSU/BCS bashing session here, why I just love that fact that OSU is playing for the title again! How awesome is that? I get to gouge my eyes out again…And, no more Ted Ginn Jr. to get my motor running for at least 10 seconds of the game. I’d rather sit through, (or at least try my damndest) to sit through a Miami Dolphins game than watch the Buckeyes try to win, (HAHA, funny, win) a National Championship. I will point out, and yes it’s to my dismay that the Buckeyes being in New Orleans makes sense since they were third and the top two teams lost…Wow, that’s logic!
Thing is, that’s the only thing that was logical throughout this college football season…And well, should we be surprised? Remember Boise State/Oklahoma 11 months ago…Turns out that was just a prelude to what we were going to be in store for in the college football 2007 season! So who do I think should be playing in the game? Going by the Saturday polls, it’s simple OSU & Georgia! Simply because they were third & fourth respectively. Although not winning/or even playing for the conference championship would’ve leaped frog teams over them! Actually, I’ll admit…I would’ve voted these two teams in too! The only other conference champion was Virginia Tech, who got mangled by LSU! Damn you Couch Burners!
However, to the peeps whose blood doesn’t bubble over this National Title game, (and I used that term very loosly) perhaps this may do the trick…(It’s well worth the 4:29 watch time!)
Holy Buckeye!
Unfortunately, still one question remains unanswered…"Who will win the Heisman?" I wonder what the BCS say would say about that? Tim Tebow or Run DMC? Which one is going to be the LSU and which one is going to get screwed? Getcha Popcorn Ready…It’s going to be a show!" It might need extra butter and salt to clog the arteries...Ain't that the truth, Mizzou! Send some to Kansas and Illinois will ya! And perhaps next year we can pick "the two best teams" like popcorn kennels…Reach down and pick two out! Makes perfect sense in a sport that doesn’t have two cents!
