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As the Cowboys Turns

5
Vote

by user LastRow


For some reason this year’s edition of the Dallas Cowboys best resembles that of the prime time 80’s soup opera rather than a team preparing to kickoff their season in two weeks. How bout them Cowboys…I wonder what Jimmy Johnson feels about his former boss & the team that he helped to be so successful? Ever since the two J.J.’s have parted ways in the 90’s the Cowboys for the most part have just been an average football team. As we all know this doesn’t sit well with Jerry Jones. So bring in Bill Parcells to coach them up, and bring in a Terrell Owens to bring them down…Both have excellent resumes in doing their craft.

Number 81’s stint in Big “D” was supposed to be different. Owens vowed to be a better man and a better teammate in Dallas. While the fine is the most drastic, he already has done plenty to stand out. If anybody believes this I have some land in the Everglades I would like to sell…Taking an offers. Yes, I did say fine…Here’s a nice surprise, he’s rubbing people the wrong way already, shocker. Well, I guess it’s a bit of a surprise…Surprised that we haven’t even gotten out of the preseason with this already transpiring. Hey Big D, welcome to the live taping of T.O.’s Reality T.V. Show…Another Instant Classic, for that’s all he seems to make.

Terrell Owens has finally pushed the Dallas Cowboys too far…And we haven’t gotten to the regular season yet. Pushed, I thought this guy was hurt? Doesn’t pushing hurt the hammy? She-O has drawn a $9,500 fine for missing a team meeting and a rehabilitation session and being late to an offensive meeting. It’s one thing to be hurt, it’s another thing to put your dead ass above your teammates by not showing up to meetings. Isn’t that your job? I seem to have a bad memory, but what have you accomplished in this league to warrant all this circusness? If this doesn’t have team player writing all over it, what does Quite frankly, compared to your agent who always speaks for you, which best resembles your mouth piece he’s accomplished a whole hell of a lot more. "That's our club business. That's going to be accounted for," team owner Jerry Jones told the Dallas Morning News.

So how is this different Terrell? Oh, I guess by starting your shenanigans before getting to the regular season, that must’ve been what you meant? Jerry Jones seemed to downplay the drama surrounding Owens' injury by mentioning the fact that Steve Smith and Hines Ward also have been slowed by hamstring injuries without drawing the same scrutiny. Jerry, it’s time you faced the music pal…You ****** up. You didn’t want to listen to Parcells when he told you he didn’t want this year at the Mayo Clinic, but did you listen? Of course not...What does Tuna know anyway? Why is it you’re defending your boy anyway? After he lied to you, took your money (not that you can’t afford it) saying “things would be different”. Now it’s one thing to be hurt like Smith & Ward, it’s one thing to miss 19 of 31 practices it’s another thing to turned his hamstring injury into an attention spectacular by flying his own specialists in to help him rehabilitate and wearing a cycling team outfit one day while pedaling a stationary bicycle. How does that bitch slap in the face feel Jerry? Isn’t he worth having in your corner? Did I mention I have some property in the Everglades you might want Jerry?

"I know this - when he's healthy, he's going to help us win these ballgames," Jones said. Oh yeah, how does Bill feel about that? Judging by your last two exhibition games, seems to me the receivers are doing just fine without him having gone 3-0…Not too shabby. Sure, I suppose your right, when “the player” gets back on the field things will certainly change, going from bad to worse. Well, that is if he gets on the field since Parcells said this week that he needs to see Owens on the field. So here’s what’s going to happen…She-O’s going to come bitching to you that Big Bad Tuna not play him, and of course he’s 100 percent. You’re going to go bitch to Bill you want “the player” out there, Bill’s going to say no & then he going to look like the bad guy, not Owens. Larry Hagman can play the Tuna, Patrick Duffy can play you Jerry…Although, I haven’t got a clue on whom can play Owens. I got an idea, I’ll just go back and re-look at the tape…You know there’s over 10 years of it. Maybe that will give me a better idea of whom can best play him? Looking forward for this soap-opera to continue to grow & blow up all over the country. To think Jerry, and you thought you were in the professional football business.

LastRowSports.com


Date

Sun 08/27/06, 4:45 pm EST


Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
DRE-LOAAA-er
1229 days ago
Score 2+-
I predicted that this would either end in a Super Bowl or a disaster. Terrell Owens is the equivalent of a horrific virus and the Cowboys are going to catch it full-blown.
Permalink | Reply
LastRowAll-American
1229 days ago
Score 0+-
Could it be the bird virus?
Permalink
Bleeding GreenVarsity
1228 days ago
Score 1+-
I wonder how long the TO apologists are going to keep acting like this all media hype?
Permalink | Reply
Anonymous Fanatic #1
1228 days ago
Score 0+-
Step 1: Release T.O. Step 2: Use that money to sign Deion Branch
Permalink | Reply
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1228 days ago
Score 1+-
You get what you pay for...T. Eldorad Owens, the best WR ever! Just ask him! All will ok in Big D as long as they win. T.E.O. is peachy when the team wins. If they start to lose, expect the T.O. nonsense to elevate to yet another Terrellible level.
Permalink | Reply
Bleeding GreenVarsity
1228 days ago
Score 1+-
To first started trouble in Philly during a Giants game halfway through the season in the midst of a superbowl run... He doesn't losing to set him off. He'll go off regardless of the situation.
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
1228 days ago
Score 1+-
You can't spell trouble without a T and an O
Permalink
Anonymous Fanatic #2
1228 days ago
Score 0+-
TO can eat my sausage - he's a peice of shit!!
Permalink | Reply
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This page was last modified 12:46, 28 August 2006. Content is available under the GFDL.

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