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There are some things about sports I don't like... the New Yuck Muts, the University of Michigan and those ASSCRACK UGLY HELMETS, the Floridamn Gayturds and the Miami Crimicanes. I also think that NASCRAP and professional wrestling are a HUGE waste of air time on television and would rather watch women's Jello wrestling! More By Cougar2000
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Zito needs to get his act together
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When the San Francisco Giants signed Barry Zito to pitch for them in 2007, they thought their troubles were at an end. Nothing could be further from the truth. Zito is 0-5 with an ERA in the high fives and is as hittable as a pitching machine at the county fair. To paraphrase Ausin Powers, Zito has lost his mojo. Maybe it's on a milk carton somewhere in Silicon Valley.
Perhaps Zito needs to listen to his uncle, Patrick Duffy, of Dallas fame.
Barry, you're too good a pitcher to be pitching this badly. 18 million dollars to pitch this badly? Embarrassing! Suck it up. Right now, you are so bad, even I could hit you! You are now the face of the Giants since a certain outfielder has left the building (Barry Lamar Bonds). There's still time to put this behind you. Do something, even if it means taking every last damned teddy bear you have on the road. I'm not saying be the next Mark Fidyrich, just get your ducks in a row. It's time to get the form back that got you the Cy Young in 2002 for Oakland.
It's time for Barry Zito to show up.
And bring his mojo.
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