Pacman Jones Holds a Gun to Your Head, Tells You to Pick One…Bonds or Clemens?

With the media spotlight once again shining on two of Major League Baseball’s prominent names once again over the past week or so involving, it got me to thinking, (I know, that’s a scary thought) if you had to, (and when I say had to, well, just read the headline to this spit and hopefully you’ll figure it out) pick one of the cheaters for the Hall of Fame…Which cheater would it be? Bonds or Clemens?

Seemingly these two dill pickles are from the same pickle jar…Having poked and probed themselves with God knows what and God knows when, all the while maintaining that they haven’t done a single thing wrong time and time again. No matter how much hot air they have blown out of their pieholes, we all know differently…Now whether or not they actually believe the gusty winds they are blowing, who knows? I’d say, it’s likely…Just as O.J. still believes he didn’t commit a double murder and not in anyway try to jack up a Las Vegas hotel room to get his belongings back. Just as Casey Anthony is claiming that she had nothing to do with killing her daughter!

Here we have two shoe-ins for the Hall of Fame…One is the All-Time Homerun King and one who’s one of the most phenomenal pitchers the game has ever seen. Unfortunately, due to the fact that they insisted on turning their bodies into human pin and needle cushions respectively "allegedly" , donating their bodies to science, everything that these two lying assholes ever accomplished through their careers is tainted…And will forever be looked at in a different perspective.

So knowing all we know about Bonds and Clemens…Knowing that they’re guilty for lack of a better word, you have one vote. You have to pick your poison on this one…Who gets the Hall of Fame vote on your ballot. I know, I know…That’s a tough one. Now we all know how Miss Elizabeth felt when she had to choose between the two Mega Powers for WrestleMania V when Mean Gean pressed her for an answer! Roll it…(BTW: It’s a very entertaining 5-plus mins.)

Damn, that’s really difficult to choose!! Perhaps if I was drunk it’d be easier to figure out? Can I flip a coin? I guess I would have to go with Bonds. Yes, he’s been defiant on the issue…Although just something rubs me the wrong way that Roger has handled this whole ordeal. Throwing his wife under the bus, throwing his BFF Andy under the bus…I’m sure Bonds would do the same thing, just we haven’t seen it…Doing the "I’m innocent publicity tour". All the while having said he didn’t know anything about HGH, but his wife is in the other room stabbing herself with it. The more and more Roger and his hand puppet Rusty say, the deeper the hole gets. Clemens made a mountain out of a mole hill…A mountain that he can’t climb, although he believes he can. And I guess that’s where my foundation of me selecting Bonds stems from. RC believes that he can beat this…His actions suggest it. On the other hand Bonds, doesn’t really a shit! Bonds doesn’t care whether he gets into the hall or not…The flip of that, Clemens wants us to believe he has the same attitude as Barry regarding Cooperstown, but we all know different! We all know that he’d be crushed not being inducted into Cooperstown…So, that’s a lie right there! Dig It Brother! I love Mean Gean!

My vote goes to Barry on this one, but it’s definitely too close to call!

And if you thought that was difficult to choose, I‘ve got something that will make you feel like Wade Boggs on a cross country flight! Since you’re in the voting mind frame, CoEdMagazine.com needs you to vote on its Miss COED January 2009 competition. It’ll have you saying, "Barry and Roger who"? Remember, Pacman Jones still has that gun to your head! So please take your time in deciding. Damn, I love the coeds…WooHoo!