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MegECass110
Just taking everything one day at a time.

Follow me on Twitter! twitter.com/MeganCassidy


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Awesomely Awesome Moments from...the Clemens 60 Minutes Interview

by MegECass110
created January 07, 2008, last edited February 10, 2009
25
Vote


I have never watched a full episode of 60 Minutes in my entire life. Neither has Chuck Norris or Wes Welker, as they both watch 60 minutes in 20 minutes. That's about to change, as the Scum of the Earth is about to take the stand in Court of Public Opinion. Mike Wallace, you may proceed.

  • In the opening segment, where they show all of the stories that will air in the episode, there's a clip of Clemens saying, "After 24, 25 years Mike, you'd thank I'd git an eench a respect!" I'll refrain from spelling phonetically from here on out, because it would be indecipherable, but that's what he sounded like. I love Southern accents, but not when they're spoken by an obnoxious egomaniac who may be lying on national television.
  • Mike Wallace is really wrinkly.
  • Wallace starts asking about how Clemens can possibly pitch this well for this long, saying it's impossible. Clemens responds by saying it is possible, with hard work. Meaning getting your ass shot up?
  • Wallace is reading a segment from the Mitchell Report, Roger is looking down nervously and nodding/shaking his head. He continues to do this while Wallace is asking all of his questions and reading the Mitchell report. Clemens usually responds with, "Never happened." Nothing more than that, so Wallace continues. No berating McNamee, no further explanation.
  • Clemens says that if he had been taking steroids, his body would have changed, a third ear would have grown out of his head and he would be able to pull a truck with his teeth. I think his chin has been made up to disguise the ear.
  • Best question so far...What would McNamee gain from lying to Mitchell's committee? Clemens says he thinks by lying, McNamee got himself out of going to jail for selling steroids. Wallace continues by asking why McNamee would tell the truth about Andy Pettitte, but lie about Clemens, Roger simply says the two cases are very different, with no further explanation. What? How are they different?
  • Clemens says he is concerned with the amount of Vioxx he took for his joints, now that it's been recalled and has shown possible damage to his heart. Really? That's the biggest thing you're worried about, Rocket?
  • Clemens says he's not sure if he can defend himself, that people have already made their judgments. I thought he was a selfish pig before the Mitchell Report, so it's a lost cause for me.
  • Clemens says he's retiring? Really? Wallace makes the point of his numerous un-retirements, but I feel like the Mitchell Report will exhaust his passion for the game to the point where he doesn't want to pitch anymore. Plus, if he did take steroids, his body should be breaking down by now.

Overall, disappointing for a few reasons. He didn't seem that angry, he just seemed whiny about the fact he's been painted as guilty when no hard evidence has been presented. He didn't feel the need to explain his denials, as if he felt a "Never happened" would be satisfactory to the American public. He didn't seem angry at McNamee, just sort of miffed, nothing that McNamee's lawyers could sue for.

The worst part of this whole thing is, how the hell are we supposed to know who is telling the truth? A lie detector, as Wallace suggested? Do we trust the ageless greatest pitcher of the Modern Era, or someone who told the truth about so many others under oath? This has to be one of the most frustrating sports stories I've ever come across. I will be satisfied when the truth is generated...I'm hoping this means Clemens bawling his eyes out like Marion Jones and admitting what a liar he is.


Enable Comment Auto-Refresher
Cougar2000All-American
693 days ago
Score 1+-
Okay, let's say that he did the deed. Then what? Let's assume him innocent and see what he has to say to Congress in ten days' time. It should be interesting... although I'd pay big $$$$ to see him pull that tractor with his teeth.
Permalink | Reply
Tmil42AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 1+-
Oh come on, we don't have a page for Chuck Norris?


We ought to.
Permalink | Reply
MegECass110AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 2+-
The reason is, the page can't be created by someone. The page must spontaneously generate, for any page created for Chuck by some random person would not be worthy.
Permalink
Oh No RomoDraft Pick
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kicked me yesterday
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Frank Robinson would kick Chuck Norris' ass!!!
Permalink
Amilke60Div-I Stud
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Romo there is no way you survive a roundhouse from Chuck. It's just not physically possible.
Permalink
MegECass110AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Chuck Norris was in a knife fight yesterday. The knife lost.
Permalink
KillingpabloJV Squad
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Damn I was hoping Chuck lost.
Permalink
SSreportersLegend
693 days ago
Score 3+-
The Wallace interview with Clemens has set a record for oldest combined age between interviewer and the one who was interviewed (7,009).
Permalink | Reply
RomiezzoLegend
693 days ago
Score 2+-
So this means that that this isn't gonna happen? :(
Permalink | Reply
Tmil42AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 1+-
Clemens said it probably wouldn't happen. He wouldn't absolutely rule it out, so that could absolutely still happen.
Permalink
False ProphetAll-Star
693 days ago
Score 1+-
Rodger: "My Groin is tired"

Cashman: "You had your Groin removed last year Mr. Clemens..."

I remember the first time I saw that video, and I still love it
Permalink
SSreportersLegend
693 days ago
Score 4+-
Indeed, Roger's groin is tired... yankee.jpg
Permalink
MegECass110AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 2+-
Please tell me that's Andy Pettite...
Permalink
SSreportersLegend
693 days ago
Score 1+-
We know that this is photoshopped....I will not make the joke I'd like to make about injections in the butt.
Permalink
Falcon02520Legend
693 days ago
Score 2+-
still found a way to squeeze that joke in anyway, huh SS?
Permalink
False ProphetAll-Star
693 days ago
Score 1+-
I think that the problem he had is that of he says anything against anyone, he's in court the next day. Any sort of denial would involve saying something about someone, which he can't do. My take? Clemens did some wierd stuff during his career, including rubbing Icy Hot down his pants before starts. He probably tried all sorts of stuff including some sort of illegal substances. Clemens probably is regretting everything (legal or not) that he's tried over the years now that this is out
Permalink | Reply
Tmil42AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Well, one of the reasons that the few players who actually cooperated with the Mitchell Report (Glenallen Hill, for example) refused to name names is because of the legal issues involved. Without positive proof, it wouldn't do them any good and would cause more harm than good and lead to a bevy of lawsuits.
Permalink
Anonymous Fanatic #1
693 days ago
Score 0+-
i have a different purview of the issue <a href="http://rawda...emen-cy.html">clemen----cy</a>
Permalink | Reply
Tmil42AAA-er
693 days ago
Score 2+-
Why don't you set up an account and post it here, then?
Permalink
Manny StilesMajor Leaguer
693 days ago
Score 3+-
I said "Lie Detector" YEARS ago - a drug test is FAR easier to fake out than a lie detector test!!! It's been proven! You have to be a complete psychopath - the type of psychopath that wouldn't make it in society, let alone through a baseball season - to deceive a lie detector!

Give them all lie detectors and if they fail or admit to usage, then it's on to blood tests to be sure!!! Jeez, with a lie detector, you can find out HOW MUCH not just "if" they used!

Of course, being the logical solution it is... it won't happen as long as there's a player's union!
Permalink | Reply
KillingpabloJV Squad
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Why not hire Mr Fucker (how do they spell it?) in Meet the Parents. Do the pulse thing.
Permalink
FrugolfVarsity Captain
693 days ago
Score 0+-
The lie detector would not help.Everyone has already made up their mind.Anyone that hated Clemens before this has him guilty,and that list is long.Those fans who like him believe him and that list is short.
Permalink | Reply
Cougar2000All-American
692 days ago
Score 0+-
Even if you did a lie detector test, there's not a court on the face of God's Earth that would admit it.
Permalink
Tyrone BriggsHall of Famer
693 days ago
Score 1+-
So who is the next Yankee to use 60 minutes for publicity spin control?
Permalink | Reply
RomiezzoLegend
693 days ago
Score 0+-
Koby Clemens?
Permalink
Anonymous Fanatic #2
692 days ago
Score -3+-
What is with the Brazil panties? That is gross Throne Briggs. Well... I guess I kind of like it.
Permalink | Reply
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Categories: Opinions | Opinions by User MegECass110 | January 7, 2008 | January 2008 | MLB Opinions

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