5 Telltale Signs Of Referee Corruption

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With more and more allegations coming out thanks to Tim Donaghy squealing like a stuffed pig, we must now take it upon ourselves to keep a lookout for these foul, loathsome evil-doers. Many of these refs may be lurking under the guise of a variety of different personas, so we can no longer go by whether or not they look like they’re in the Italian mafia. Although that's definitely a good place to start.

What follows is a list of the five telltale signs you may be watching a corrupt referee at work. Since the NBA refuses to address the issue in any way, other than assuring us that it isn‘t an issue, there isn’t too much you can do. Not betting on any game in which they’re involved is good a place to start as any.

5. There is a suspicious disparity among fouls. Even the most seasoned, crooked refs sometimes can’t help themselves. The prospect of either fixing the game or having their legs broken is just too intoxicating and they do not realize that a team free throw disparity of 40/5 is remarkably suspicious.

4. The referee in question is handing out technical fouls to anyone who even looks at him the wrong way. In fact, he actually just called one on Tim Duncan. Yeah, seriously. Tim Duncan.

3. The horrible calls are all coming from a ref who just doesn‘t look very nice. He has the look of a man who, if you tried to cut him in a supermarket, would probably try and smash you over the head with a shopping basket and then take your box of Rice Krispie Treats Cereal.

2. It’s the conference finals and one team would make ridiculously more money than the other, should they get into the Finals. This situation is a breeding ground for corrupt referees. In fact, it’s been rumored that this type of situation would send corrupt refs all across the country on a pilgrimage to the said series. Since all they care about is themselves, other corrupt referees are all that they have in life. Besides their seedy dealings with the underworld, of course.

1. The underdog’s three point lead is staying that way through a variety of fouls, technical’s and lulls in play due to the referee throwing players on the favorite’s team out of the game for looking at him the wrong way. It’s interesting to note that absolutely no calls have gone against the underdog, even though there have been multiple travels, fouls and one very shallow insult about someone’s mother.

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