Armchair Idiots Episode Two: Are you even surprised?
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by user Debo
Well, after a long hiatus, Debo is back in the scene here at ArmchairGM. I won't get into details, but due to extenuating circumstances I have been cut off of the internet/computer for a while. Nevertheless, I am back and hopefully I can start writing regularly again.
As if anyone is surprised, yet another Cincinnati Bengals player was arrested today. Odell Thurman was pulled over and charged with DWI. His blood alcohol limit was .18, more than twice the legal limit of .08. Thurman is 6'0" and 235 pounds, and not to mention a freakish athlete. Now if my math is right, he had to have downed roughly 134 cold ones to get his BAL that high. Nice.
Not only did Thurman get drunken driving charges, but this comes on top of his four-game suspension for substance abuse that he is ALREADY SERVING!!! Way to go, Odell. Nothing like getting tanked and going for a joyride to send those suspension blues away. I guess his withdrawals for pot were too intense for him just to, you know, work out, get in shape for the rest of the season, hit the weightroom, straighten himself out, etc. etc. You gotta numb those symptoms somehow, I suppose.
The best part about all of that was that Bengals rookie Reggie McNeal was IN THE CAR with Thurman and fellow inmate errrr...teammate Chris Henry, who was arrested several (four? I can't remember for sure) times this summer. I can only imagine the conversation last night.
Henry: Hey Reggie, come on, me and Odell will show you how the REAL Bengals party it up!
McNeal: Uhhh, I dunno guys, shouldn't we maybe be, I dunno, sleeping, or basking in our lavish houses, pots of gold, and wiping our asses with 20 dollar bills?
Henry: Come on, dawg! You ain't gonna get on the front page of ESPN.com if you're a responsible adult! Let's go!
McNeal: Okay...Odell, are you good to drive?
Thurman: No, YOU'RE UGLY!! Don't taaawk so loud, my headd hurtsch.
Henry: See dude? He's fine! Let's go!
Hmmm, I'd probably find a different crowd to hang out with Reggie, other than someone who is already serving a suspension, let alone getting tanked in the back of his Hummer, and then proceeding to drive it straight into the ditch. Oh, and Chris Henry isn't exactly a choice role model either. I guess if McNeal wants to fit in with the Bungals though, he's gonna have to learn to do this crap sometime.
Oh, and just for the record, this is the 6th Bengal (not counting multiple arrests, such as Chris Henry) arrested this past year.
Date
Mon 09/25/06, 12:10 pm EST
