An Endzone Celebration for Chad
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In case you weren’t excited enough for the NFL regular season to start, Chad Johnson declared today that he has some “entertainment” planned to get us pumped up. If Johnson scores a touchdown in that opening week he promises to produce an endzone celebration that will leave us “laughing for a lifetime.” You need not worry about the hefty fine Johnson will surely incur from the NFL, CJ has already included a fine column in his budget to pay for such “entertainment.”
Sorry Chad, but I am going to have to ask you to pass because while your actions do cause my insides to hurt it is not for the reason in which you hope. Your antics do not induce years of laughter in me, but a lifetime of groans. Sure, I have been known to chuckle a bit at some of the selfish celebrations, but sadly not yours.
I found Terrell Owens' Sharpie and Joe Horn’s cell phone celebrations to be far funnier than anything you’ve come up with. I see you as a copycat who adds nothing to the original version. But this is not why you disgust me. You, and all others who do premeditated endzone celebrations, disgust me because you fail to include your teammates in your acts.
Do you really believe Chad that when you score that no one helped you do it? It makes me sick when a guy scores a touchdown and his teammates come over to congratulate him he pushes them away so he can perform the celebration he came up with earlier in the week. Do you really believe that you still would have ended up in that endzone if your teammates had stood around and done nothing? Who would have snapped the ball? Would you have passed to yourself?
Sure, you are one of the better receivers and you do deserve to be set apart from the others. But no matter how good of a receiver you are Chad, you would be nothing if Carson Palmer didn’t throw you the ball, and even though Palmer is too one of the best in the league at his position he would never have time to throw to you without blocking. If the other receivers around you didn’t provide a threat you would be triple and quadruple teamed; good luck scoring then. It’s arrogant and selfish for you to be recipient on a touchdown score and not have the first thing you do be to thank your teammates for helping you, to not celebrate the team’s success with them.
If you really want to make me happy, include every single one of your teammates in your crazy skit. I’ll even write the script for you, when you make the catch and they come over to say, "hey nice job," you slap them on the helmet back. Then you run over and thank Carson for the nice pass, and high five all the linemen. No matter how funny your original skit was, I can guarantee that the good feelings that will accompany watching you do the right thing will last much longer. I will be so entertained, I just might give you a standing ovation.
1. Chad's best celebration happened in Cleveland when Jon Kitna threw a long TD pass right before halftime. Chad waved teammates over who pretended to snap photos of him while he posed. He was FLAGGED for involving his teammates. You can't include teammates. When Chad tried to tone it down and partake in a simple chest bump with Housh they were flagged for team celebration.
2. Chad has the most inventive celebrations in the history of the sport. The river dance was impeccable. You could tell he practiced that and did a fine job. It only took a second and had people (clearly not you) liked it for a while. Giving the ball mouth to mouth and listening for a heart beat was great. Square dancing around the goal post was good. TO is the one who imitates other people's dances (Ray Lewis), and has a far worse attitude than Chad.
Chad's teammates love his charisma. Chad always, always gives credit to every other player in his interviews (Sundays 10:30 ch. 19 wxyx "Chad's Corner"). He works hard in every practice and is always involved in community and team activities. Marvin loves his work ethic and he strives to be the best. He's a brash guy who loves to have fun. If you don't like brash guys, that's fine. But don't call him unoriginal or a non-team player.