Allen Iverson TRADED!
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by user Manny Stiles
As a tribute to one of my favorite websites
Allen Iverson was TRADED
...is a headline that should have occurred already this year. Actually it did. He was traded to the Celtics, to the Hawks to the Warriors then BACK to the Sixers all for players to be named later, rights to exchange draft picks, future considerations and undisclosed amounts of cap space.
The Spurs-Pistons Finals may have been the Finest finals ever
... as everyone with any basketball knowledge expected.
The Colts will try to repeat Last Year's 19-0 Perfect Season
...could they become the NFLs first back-to-back undefeated team?
Larry Brown's Spectacular Record in Jeopardy
LB has always had his team perform better during his second season at the helm...
Royals' Youth Leading the Way
Allard Baird proclaimed as Greatest Talent Evaluator of the Decade, Best since Cam Bonifay.
Hockey on OLN a SMASHING Success!
Outdoor Life Network suddenly changes it's oxymoronic name to prevent people from remembering the messy 2005 skeet shooting scandals.
Albert Pujols on Pace for 100 HRs
Some say having the Cardinals play an extra 75 games this season may aid his efforts.
USA soccer could be better than ever before
Once U.S. Military leaders decide it's time to forcibly overtake all soccer playing countries.
Barry Bonds Indicted!
Also, apologizes to media for being such a dickhead for so long, admits use of HGH while signing thousands of $20 autographs for his ex-girlfriend; also admits to not washing his hands after bathroom visits and apologizes for once kicking a puppy while jaywalking.
Joe Namath sexually assaulted by a drunken Suzy Kolber
because these are the little things that make life fun.
Matt Millen added to Mensa List
...of people NEVER to be allowed membership.
USC wins unprecedented 3rd Title
Tops list of highest paid student-athletes 3 years running.
Steinbrenner Makes Changes
Due to sudden fiscal restraint, the New York Yankees' owner decided it would just be cheaper to own the Knicks and requested to trade franchises with James Dolan. Dolan, upon the advice of Isiah Thomas demanded that Babe Ruth's number be unretired so Stephon Marbury can wear it... When Steinbrenner realizes Dolan wants to trade players not sports teams, he figures the Yankees roster could accidentally end up with a better record in the NBA (RJ at center) than the Knicks (as-is!) and backs out of deal.
Maurice Clarett Earns Roster Spot, Loses it
Joins a team named "Hitmen" (seriously), then gets cut after team finds out the sissy wears a bulletproof vest and can't finish a bottle of Grey Goose with out the assistance of Tasers.
Manny Stiles named Best, Most Creative and Overly Original Unpaid Sportswriter
Claims the World's Most Humble, Anti-Kornheiser, 'Dr Commento' aka Manny Stiles. (Also named most ridiculous, annoying and irritating commentor on ArmchairGM.)
Stiles Draftgeeks Fantasy Football league
No, I didn't forget. The draft will be at the LAST possible moment (after the last pre-season game) so no one gets screwed by season ending injuries. REMEMBER - this is a draft-only, no roster move league. Best draft/Most luck wins!
Still have 4 openings! To join - Yahoo League #277973, password armchair
freeking disclaimers, etc
- This article contains less than 10% real sports
- Do not apply this article to your skin, clothes or open wounds.
- OVERRATED is the new OVERRATED
- Side effects of reading Manny Stiles posts may include, but is not limited to headaches, nausea, lack of apathy, chronic eye rolling and/or hysterical pregnancy.
- Humor is sarcasm wrapped in a thin veil of sarcasm
Date
Tue 08/15/06, 12:10 pm EST
