A Popular Christmas Refrain - "I Used HGH Once"
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by FatMan
The good tidings have begun. Cheer is in the air. Spin doctors instead of elves are working hard. Because the Mitchell Report and its lack of enforcement not just results in skewed public perception on who is really using the steroids, but now players are lining up to craft a defense.
Andy Pettitte only used HGH to help a sore elbow heal so he could return to the team more quickly. It is all about team, right?
Fernando Vina, looking to keep a cushy ESPN job, said he took HGH once - never bought it from the Mets clubhouse snitch, and used it to rehab a hurt shoulder and knee. He just wanted to get onto the field to play the game he loves.
Brian Roberts used HGH only on very few occasions and only to rehab from injury. I was waiting for him to say he did it to get the red out of his eyes or to improve his vision.
Now, I don't blame the players for doing this. We are a very forgiving society. We'll think to ourselves that these guys are full of crap, but then when push comes to shove, we'll step back and say - "Everyone in America deserves a second chance". Steve Howe got 7 of them. Darryl Strawberry and Dwight Gooden got that many combined. Heck, even a murderer like Don King not only got a second chance, he gets to be a multi-million dollar man.
We will welcome these guys back in because we are spineless pussies. And when it comes down to it, we will march to the stadium and watch guys whose heads have grown due to using HGH "once" to cure a headache. And we'll cheer at each HR. Because that's what ESPN will tell us to do. Baseball is as American as Chevy and apple pie, right??
So gather around the Christmas Tree or the Menorah and let's put more money into the coffers of people who took illegal drugs and their organizations who supported it. And while we're at it, let's root for those smug, bulky men who will still swat HR's with ease because they weren't one of the 87 who Mitchell named. Because we men aren't mice!!! We are lemmings.
